


Wild Hearts

by dS_Tiff



Category: due South
Genre: Episode Related, Episode: s01e04 They Eat Horses Don't They?, Friendship, Gen, Horses, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-08
Updated: 2014-03-08
Packaged: 2018-01-14 21:57:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 26,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1280230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dS_Tiff/pseuds/dS_Tiff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stephanie Cabot walks back into Fraser's life and they rekindle their unbridled romance as she faces adversity.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is set towards the end of Season 3/4 of due South. It was fun and challenging to write something a little different to my usual stories. I hope you all enjoy it. Thanks to Mock_Turtle for all the help and advice.

“It’s actually a fascinating subject…” Fraser was in full flow as he walked down the stairs at the Two Seven with Ray.

Ray wasn’t listening. Fraser had been talking about the history of graffiti for the last ten minutes, but Ray most certainly did not think it was a fascinating subject. That morning he’d arrested two girls who’d been spray painting the side of a building and he didn’t care if people had been vandalising walls since ancient times, it was still vandalism as far as he was concerned.

“Many of the earliest examples have been preserved in the ruins of Pompeii,” continued Fraser, “and…” but he was interrupted, much to Ray’s relief.

“Fraser,” Francesca called down from the top of the stairs, “someone’s waiting for you at the front desk.”

Fraser’s head spun round at the sound of her voice. “Thank you kindly, Francesca,” he smiled.

The Desk Sargent nodded an acknowledgement as Fraser and Ray walked in and she pointed to a chair where a woman was sitting. Fraser couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw who it was.

“Stephanie?” he said as he walked over to her, leaving a confused Ray standing by the desk. “Stephanie Cabot?”

Stephanie looked up and smiled. “Hi, Benton,” she replied. “I went to the old Consulate, but…”

“Ah, yes, we moved,” explained Fraser. He never thought he’d see Stephanie again, but now here she was. He didn’t know what to say to her. “I…I haven’t seen you since…”

“Since we nearly…” she replied, coyly.

“Yes,” agreed Fraser, his face flushing red.

“But didn’t…” continued Stephanie.

“Indeed,” replied Fraser. He cleared his throat and ran a finger around his collar.

Ray listened to the exchange with interest. He recognised her name, but couldn’t quite remember where he’d heard it before. It seemed that Fraser knew her well, though; very well, apparently.

“I thought you were in Africa. When did you return to Chicago?” asked Fraser.

“I’ve only been back for a couple of weeks,” replied Stephanie. “My…my father passed away suddenly. I decided to leave the project and come home to sort things out. The house, y’know and…things.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that,” Fraser replied, earnestly. From what he remembered, Stephanie and her father had been close.

“Er, I, er, I didn’t mean to overhear,” Ray stepped forward. “Ray Vecchio,” he introduced himself with a grin.

Stephanie looked at Fraser in confusion. This wasn’t Ray Vecchio. She remembered Vecchio from before and this was definitely not the same man.

“Ah,” said Fraser, rubbing his left eyebrow with his thumb. “I’ll explain later.”

Stephanie seemed satisfied with that for now.

“I was just wonderin’,” Ray continued, “if you guys wanna catch up ya could use the lunchroom. Might be more private?”

“Yes, of course,” Fraser replied. He should have thought of that himself, but Stephanie’s sudden reappearance had thrown him completely and he wasn’t thinking straight.

“Thank you,” Stephanie smiled to Ray.

“I gotta go, buddy,” said Ray, slapping Fraser affectionately on the back. “Gary Okuda ain’t gonna interview himself. Waste of time if ya ask me, but Welsh thinks it’s worth a shot. I’ll call ya later.”

Fraser half waved half saluted to his friend as Ray left the station. Then he turned back Stephanie. “This way,” he said indicating with his arm, but then he saw something that shocked him even more than the sight of Stephanie had just a few minutes earlier.

Stephanie had a baby in one arm and was attempting to fold a pushchair with her free hand. She glanced up and saw Fraser’s stunned face. “This is Mia,” she said.

“Oh,” was all Fraser could manage to reply. He stood frozen to the spot.

Stephanie continued to struggle for a moment, before she looked back at Fraser. “Would you mind?” she asked, nodding towards the pushchair.

“Oh, oh yes of course,” replied Fraser, rushing forward to take the pushchair from her. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” he mumbled apologetically as he clipped the folded pushchair together.

“It’s my fault,” Stephanie laughed at his awkwardness. “I should have mentioned…this is my daughter.”

XxXxX

“It’s a mess,” admitted Stephanie a short while later as they sat in the lunchroom at the Twenty Seventh. “The house, my father’s finances…everything. Saving orphaned elephants was much easier to deal with, believe me.”

Fraser was struggling to find the right words to say. He had so many questions for her, but he didn’t know where to start. Mia began to wriggle on Stephanie’s lap and Fraser was grateful for the distraction. He made the puffin face which seemed to amuse both Mia and her mother.

“I didn’t plan to be a Mom,” said Stephanie suddenly, her face falling. “But…” she trailed off.

Fraser was definitely surprised that she had a baby now. When he’d known her before she had spoken at great length about her desire to devote her life to saving animals and she also had strong views on overpopulation. 

“I believe it’s not always possible to plan for such occurrences,” Fraser replied.

Stephanie clearly didn’t want to talk about it now, though. Instead she returned to the topic of her father. “I’m afraid we hadn’t spoken for a while before he passed,” she explained. “He wanted me to come home when I had Mia, but I didn’t want to. We were doing some amazing work in Africa, really important work and Kenya is a great place to raise a child. They have a different attitude over there, it’s wonderful.” Her eyes lit up as she spoke of the country that had been her home for the last three years. “Daddy didn’t understand though. We argued about it and then suddenly he was gone.”

“It must have been very difficult for you,” said Fraser sympathetically.

“It was,” nodded Stephanie, sadly. “Poachers kill the adults for their ivory and the babies are…”

“I meant losing your father,” Fraser interrupted her.

“Oh, yes,” she acknowledged. “But I’m OK,” Stephanie insisted. “I mean, I can cope.”

Fraser nodded. He wasn’t convinced that she was OK at all, but Stephanie had always been a strong minded woman and she obviously did not like admitting to anyone that she was struggling. She probably hadn’t really admitted it to herself, Fraser realised. “If there’s anything I can do…” he began.

“Well, actually that’s why I’m here,” Stephanie replied quickly. “I hate to have to ask and normally I could do it all by myself, but it’s just that the house badly needs repairs and I just can’t access any of Daddy’s money to pay for contractors. I even had to let both the stablehands go. Not that I mind taking care of the horses, but I don’t really have the time right now on top of everything else. My lawyer is trying his best; at least he says he is, but…”

“I’d be happy to help,” replied Fraser.

“I could do it on my own,” Stephanie insisted, “but with Mia and the horses…” she trailed off.

Fraser smiled. “I don’t doubt your determination and abilities,” he replied, “but you have other responsibilities now.”

“Thank you,” replied Stephanie. “I hate having to ask you, especially after all this time, but I really need a friend and I have no one else here in Chicago.”

Fraser nodded understandingly. He realised her pride was dented just by having to ask for help. It had taken a lot for her to seek him out.

“Perhaps I could take you to dinner?” Fraser asked suddenly. He couldn’t quite believe he’d been so forward and his face flushed again. “We can talk then…if…that is, if you…” he stumbled.

“Of course,” replied Stephanie, smiling again. “We can discuss the repairs that need doing. My father was paying contractors before he died, so there’s a lot of half-finished work. In fact, why don’t you come to the house and I’ll cook dinner. Then I can show you around. How does tomorrow evening sound?”

“That would be delightful,” replied Fraser, hoping she didn’t notice the beads of sweat that were already forming on his forehead at the prospect. _Dinner with an old friend, that’s all it is._

xXxXx

“You wrapped him in meat? I bet Vecchio was pissed!” Ray stuffed more pizza into his mouth before he’d finished talking.

“He was, perhaps, a little perturbed at the time,” agreed Fraser. “Although given the alternative, I imagine he was philosophical about the incident.”

“And those guys were sellin’ meat from wild horses?” queried Ray.

“Unfortunately, yes,” replied Fraser. “Stephanie Cabot’s assistance was invaluable in solving the case.”

Diefenbaker snatched a slice of pizza from the box and ran into the kitchen of Ray’s apartment to eat it.

“Hey!” exclaimed Ray. 

“My apologies, Ray,” said Fraser with a frown. “He has developed a complete disregard for manners lately. I will reimburse you, of course…” He paused and turned his head towards the kitchen before continuing with his voice raised, “…out of Diefenbaker’s allowance.”

Dief thought now was a good time to pretend he hadn’t heard and instead he just licked his lips.

Ray laughed. He didn’t care about the cost of one slice of pizza; he was enjoying the company. Even with the wolf padding around his apartment and stealing pizza, it was better than being alone.

“So, you and Stephanie, er…” Ray grinned at his buddy. “She helped ya with the case and then…what?” He winked.

“If you are inferring anything improper, then you are mistaken,” replied Fraser. 

“No, buddy, I did not mean anything improper,” laughed Ray, miming quotation marks around the last word. “I meant sex!”

Fraser almost choked on his pizza. “I, um…I, er…” he spluttered. He sipped at his water until he had regained his composure. “Stephanie and I enjoyed each other’s company for a while, that is all.”

“Ya sound disappointed,” observed Ray.

Fraser felt himself blushing. He couldn’t deny it, especially not to Ray. He and Stephanie had become more than just friends after he and the real Ray Vecchio had closed the horsemeat case. She shared his love of horses and concern for the environment and they had enjoyed spending time together. “Unfortunately our fledging courtship was cut short when Stephanie was offered the opportunity to travel to Kenya and work with the orphaned elephant programme,” he explained.

“What the heck does ‘fledgling courtship’ mean?” asked Ray, scratching his head.

“It does not mean sex,” Fraser replied.

Ray laughed and headed to the fridge to get another beer. “Fraser and the rich babe, sittin’ in a tree,” he chanted, “K-I-S-S-I-N-G!”

Fraser’s face was as red as a beetroot now. “Ray, please! It would not be chivalrous for me to discuss this further.”

“OK, so ya did get past first base then,” Ray nodded approvingly.

“Ray!”

“Second base?” Ray enquired.

“Ray!”

“Third base?” Ray already knew the answer; he could read his buddy like a book, but he was having too much fun now.

Fraser sighed in frustration. “RAY!”


	2. Chapter 2

Fraser arrived right on time carrying a bottle of non-alcoholic fruit punch and a beautiful bunch of lilies and carnations that he’d arranged himself. Technically he’d been five minutes early, but he’d taken five minutes to gather his composure before knocking on the door. Five minutes was nothing, though, compared to the hour it had taken him to decide what to wear. Eventually Dief had persuaded him that he would be overdressed for a casual dinner in his dress uniform and so he’d settled on jeans and a blue shirt. 

“Oh, they’re beautiful,” smiled Stephanie as he handed her the flowers. “I’ll find a vase. Dinner’s nearly ready.”

Before dinner, Stephanie showed Fraser around the house. Areas had apparently fallen into various states of disrepair after she’d left for Africa, although her father had been in the middle of organising some renovations at the time of his death. However, Stephanie now had no means to pay the contractors so they’d had to leave the work unfinished. 

Fraser expressed particular concern about a dilapidated, part-glazed part-brick building that stood barely five feet away from the back wall of the house. “My Mom had this orangery built a few years before she died,” Stephanie explained. “I have no idea why she thought we needed an orangery.”

“The largest orangery in Europe was built for Louis XIV at the Palace of Versailles,” said Fraser. He wasn’t sure why he’d thought that particular fact would interest Stephanie, but he’d been desperate for something to say and small talk wasn’t his strongest point. 

Stephanie tried to keep a straight face, but she just couldn’t manage it. “You haven’t changed,” she laughed. 

Fraser hoped she’d meant it as a compliment. 

He studied the orangery carefully. “It needs to be demolished,” he told her. “The structure is unstable.”

“That’s what I thought,” replied Stephanie. “I made a start,” she continued, pointing to the back wall which had a huge hole in. “I did that the first night I was back home; I just wanted to destroy something…” she trailed off.

“Grief causes different reactions in all of us,” Fraser pointed out.

Stephanie nodded. “I know I’ll get through it,” she said. “I got through losing Mom, but this was just so sudden and of course it hurts more that we’d fallen out at the time. The guilt is…” she trailed off as the tears welled in her eyes.

Fraser nodded. He knew exactly what she was going through. He and his father had barely spoken for months before he was killed and, ghostly visitations aside, he was never going to be able to make up for that.

They walked down to the stable block where Stephanie proudly introduced Fraser to the four horses that were in her care. Her father had loved the animals too and they had obviously been well looked after.

“The other stable block just needs some modernisation and then I can bring in some more animals,” said Stephanie, stroking the nose of a dapple grey pony. 

They walked back to the house for dinner. Stephanie had made a bobotie with sweet potato and beans and served it straight from the slow cooker. Fraser had never eaten an African casserole before and he thought it was delicious.

“I’ll give you the recipe,” Stephanie offered. “It’s very simple to make. I adore African cuisine and they have so many vegan dishes; I’ve never eaten as well in my life as I did over there.”

After dinner, Fraser and Stephanie went to sit in one of the few habitable rooms in the house. The sofa was old and tired and creaked when they sat down. Fraser noticed a row of photographs on the mantelpiece and recognised several of Stephanie as a child. She had been a pretty young girl who had grown into a beautiful woman, Fraser thought to himself, glancing across to her. He felt relaxed in her company, as if they had never been apart.

“Tomorrow is my day off,” Fraser told her. “I’ll return in the morning and take care of the orangery for you. It is unsafe in its current condition. It shouldn’t take me long to demolish it.”

“Thank you,” replied Stephanie. “I could do it myself, but…”

“It’s alright,” Fraser held up a hand to stop her. “It’s no trouble.” He had no doubt at all that she was capable and he wished she didn’t constantly feel the need to try to prove that to him.

“Mia’s nanny will take her for a few hours,” explained Stephanie. “I wish she could have her for the whole day; she seems nice, but I can’t afford to pay her for that long. I found her through an agency so the rates are high, but they come highly recommended and I needed to know I could trust her with Mia.”

“Of course. I understand,” replied Fraser. 

“I don’t have a choice, I have so much to do and I just can’t take care of Mia at the same time,” Stephanie continued.

“It must not be easy for you,” said Fraser, sympathetically.

“No! No, it’s not easy at all!” exclaimed Stephanie.

Fraser was taken aback by how animated she suddenly became.

“I didn’t plan this, I didn’t plan any of it,” she continued. “But once I’d got over the shock of finding out I was pregnant I thought I could manage. Motherhood is part of nature; except in a few rare cases, nurturing is instinctive, but…” she trailed off.

“I’ve seen you with Mia, your nurturing skills are in no doubt,” smiled Fraser supportively.

Stephanie shrugged. Mia was nearly eight months old and while she’d been living in Africa she hadn’t worried too much about her abilities as a mother, but now she was back home in Chicago, suddenly everything seemed like a huge struggle.

“If you don’t mind me asking,” Fraser began gingerly, but he didn’t need to complete his question; Stephanie knew what he wanted to ask.

“It wasn’t a serious relationship, we were just friends really,” she started to explain. “We only had one night together.”

“You…you don’t have to tell me,” said Fraser, wishing he hadn’t brought up the subject.

“No, no, it’s OK,” Stephanie replied. “I haven’t told anyone before, but I want you to know. It was his last night with us before he left to head up a zebra reserve in Namibia. I haven’t heard from him since; he doesn’t know about Mia.”

“Do you have a means of contacting him now?” asked Fraser.

“No, but I could probably find out if I asked around,” Stephanie admitted. “I don’t want to burden him, though. Mountain Zebra are endangered; there are only around twelve hundred left in the wild. They are much more important than me.”

Fraser admired her passion for endangered species, although he couldn’t help but think Mia’s father would want to know that he had a daughter.

“I don’t need his money,” said Stephanie, suddenly. “Once my father’s finances are sorted out Mia won’t want for anything.”

Fraser nodded. He didn’t want to lecture her; it wasn’t his place to do so. He hoped that once her life was more settled, Stephanie might realise that Mia’s father had a right to know about her. He was about to say something positive, but then he realised that Stephanie was crying. 

Fraser slid across the sofa and slipped his arm around her. “Sshhh,” he tried to soothe her.

“I’m sorry,” she replied. “I don’t normally do this.” Stephanie hated that she was crying in front of Fraser, but she felt so overwhelmed by everything and she couldn’t help it.

“It’s perfectly alright,” replied Fraser. “You have had a lot to cope with recently.”

“I love my daughter with all of my heart, but I never wanted children,” sobbed Stephanie. “The world’s resources are already under enough strain without another mouth to feed. I wanted to dedicate my life to the animals.”

“There’s no reason why being a parent should prevent you from continuing your work,” replied Fraser.

“A single parent,” Stephanie said, pulling away from him and folding her arms across her chest. “A single parent with a house that’s falling down around me and no money to pay for the repairs…or to pay for anything else for that matter; that’s who I am now.”

xXxXx

The next morning dawned unseasonably warm and Fraser returned to Stephanie’s house bright and early, just as he’d promised. He found Stephanie already at the site of the orangery with a sledgehammer and some tools she’d found in her father’s old tool shed. Mia was in her pushchair eating some sliced banana. She seemed happy to watch her mother work and Fraser smiled at how content she was.

“I thought we should take out some of these panels first,” said Stephanie as she struggled with a large pane of glass.

Fraser rushed forward to help her. “The construction techniques employed in the building of this structure were truly appalling,” Fraser noted as the window easily lifted out of its substandard surround.

“My father had an old friend in the building trade,” explained Stephanie. “I think Daddy was doing him a favour by giving him work. A lot of it is like this, I’m afraid.”

They continued dismantling the orangery, carefully stacking the glass against the side of the house. After a little while, Mia started to get very restless and Stephanie lifted her out of her pushchair. “What time is it, Benton?” she asked over her shoulder.

Fraser pulled off one of his leather riggers gloves and looked at his watch. “Almost ten o’clock,” he replied.

“Oh good; Heidi will be here any minute. I’d better get Mia ready,” Stephanie said and she headed back to the main house.

Fraser continued to work and soon he noticed an old car pull up and a young woman get out. The temperature was rising steadily and he had to stop to take off his flannel shirt. As he folded it neatly and laid it on a low wall he saw the young woman leave with Mia. 

A few minutes later, Stephanie reappeared with a large glass of water. “Heidi has agreed to, er…to…” she began, but the sight of Fraser in his white, sleeveless undershirt rendered her momentarily unable to speak. His strong biceps flexed as he worked and his broad shoulders easily bore the weight of the large window frames as he carried them across the yard.

Fraser turned and looked at her questioningly and took the glass from her with a smile and a, “Thank you kindly.” He wiped away the sweat from his forehead with the back of his glove and eagerly drank the water, emptying the glass in one go.

“Heidi is going to keep Mia a little longer today,” Stephanie finally managed to get out. She still couldn’t take her eyes off him. His newly moistened lips glistened in the sun and she had to use every ounce of her self-control not to lean in and kiss them. _No, we tried that once, but we’ve both moved on,_ she reminded herself. _He’s here as a friend._

The orangery was a shadow of its former self when they stopped for lunch. The midday sun was unforgiving and Stephanie insisted they sit in the shade of a large tree; she was concerned that Fraser had worked up quite a sweat. As they ate cheese and fruit, Stephanie told him of her plans to convert part of the main house into accommodation for troubled children. “I want to build more stables so I can have more horses,” she explained. “At least ten, maybe more. The children who come to stay will get so much from being around the horses.”

“The benefits of animal assisted therapy are well documented,” agreed Fraser as he cut another slice of cheese. “It sounds like a wonderful idea.”

“As soon as Daddy’s money comes through I can start the work,” Stephanie smiled.

“There’s a lot to be done,” noted Fraser.

“Not that much,” replied Stephanie dismissively. She bit a strawberry in half and continued with her mouth full. “Once the new stable blocks are built I can start bringing in horses. I went to a sanctuary in Iowa last week; they’re being forced to close and I promised I’d take all of their animals.”

Fraser couldn’t help but wonder if she was getting ahead of herself. She’d only been back in Chicago a short time and the house needed urgent repairs before she could even consider taking on more animals.

“Mia and I will live in the north wing and then we’ll have space to accommodate at least twelve kids, plus the staff,” Stephanie continued excitedly. “An old friend of mine from college is a therapist. I already called her and she sounded really eager. It’s going to be great; I can save so many horses and we can do some really important work with the children. Make a real difference.” 

“How do you plan to fund the business in the long term?” asked Fraser.

“Fundraising,” replied Stephanie with a smile. She noticed Fraser’s look of concern. “Don’t worry, I’ve thought it all through. I can do this,” she insisted.

Fraser nodded and smiled. “I don’t doubt that for a minute,” he said. Stephanie was a determined and resolute woman and with the amount of tenacity she was demonstrating he believed that she could overcome any obstacle and succeed in achieving her dream.

They finished eating and Fraser felt refreshed and rehydrated enough to start demolishing the unstable walls. Stephanie started piling up some of the bricks, but the sight of Fraser in his sleeveless undershirt as he swung the sledgehammer over his shoulder was too distracting. As the hammer slammed into the walls and the bricks scattered at his feet, Stephanie began to wonder what might have been if she hadn’t left Chicago three years ago. 

Benton Fraser was all the man she could ever want. He was strong and capable and kind and thoughtful all rolled into one. Sharing her life with someone like him would be…but her thoughts trailed off. What was she thinking? She didn’t need a man in her life. She’d never dreamed about sharing her life with anyone. She realised what this was, it was about Mia. More specifically it was about her hormones, this was just nature kicking in. Being a mother had changed her and she hated that. Suddenly she was looking for a potential provider; someone who could take care of her and her daughter. How ridiculous is that? _I am perfectly capable of taking care of my own daughter._

She walked away from Fraser and his unintentionally overt display of masculinity and went back to the pile of windows instead. She wanted to clear her head. Being back home had reminded her of the person she used to be. She didn’t regret going to Africa; it wasn’t Africa that had changed her, it was Mia. Not that she blamed her tiny daughter - she couldn’t do that - but motherhood so far had been everything she always thought it would and those were exactly the reasons why she had decided years ago that she did not want to be a mother. 

Suddenly she heard a crack and felt a sharp pain in her arm. She hadn’t been concentrating and one of the broken windows had snapped in two as she’d lifted it, the sharp edge slicing into her right forearm. “Ow!” she yelped.

Immediately, Fraser was at her side. He had a clean, white handkerchief in his hand. “Here,” he said and began wrapping her bleeding arm.

“I’m alright,” snapped Stephanie, “I can do it.” She fumbled with her left hand, trying to push Fraser away and bind her arm on her own.

Fraser frowned. “Let me help,” he said firmly. “We need to stop the bleeding.”

“I know that,” replied Stephanie, “and I can do it on my own.”

Fraser nodded and reluctantly took a step back. To her credit, Stephanie was able to wrap the handkerchief quite tightly using only one hand.

“Are you alright?” Fraser asked when she’d finished.

“I’m fine,” she replied, forcing a smile and holding up her arm for Fraser to see.

Fraser was relieved to see that the blood hadn’t soaked through the white cloth; it must not have been too deep a cut. “Sit down for a few minutes,” he suggested. “I’m almost through with the walls.”

Stephanie was about to argue, but she realised that she felt a little shaky and perhaps resting was a good idea after all. “OK, Benton,” she said. 

Fraser proceeded to knock down the last of the walls with almost lightning speed as Stephanie looked on, holding her arm which was now starting to throb a little.

As the last of the bricks clattered to the ground, Fraser let out a sigh of relief. He wasn’t used to working in such high temperatures. He’d have razed the entire building to the ground in an hour or two had they been back home in the Yukon, but the hot sun beating down had made it much harder work.

“Have you seen yourself, by the way?” Stephanie asked with a chuckle.

Puzzled, Fraser looked down at himself. His jeans and boots were white with dust. “Oh dear,” he muttered. “I assume this is indicative of my appearance all over?”

Stephanie nodded. “You look like a ghost,” she replied.

“Well I wouldn’t be seen dead looking like that!” The voice of Bob Fraser took his son by surprise.

“You are dead,” replied Fraser in a low voice.

“What?” Stephanie was confused.

“I said…I said I’m not dead,” lied Fraser. He made a mental note to have a word with his father at the earliest opportunity about trying to engage him in conversation when there were other people in earshot. He was not happy at all that his father’s random appearances caused him to lie to people he cared about. Fortunately Bob had already disappeared.

“No, no you’re very much alive,” replied Stephanie with a smile. She stood and tried to brush some of the dust from his hair. 

Fraser froze to the spot, her touch sending tingles down his spine. He couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact with her so he just stared straight ahead.

Stephanie felt him tense and wanted to say something to help him relax, but no words came to mind so instead she began brushing dust from his cheek with her thumb.

Fraser had never forgotten the feeling of her touch, even though they’d been together only a short time. Before she’d left for Africa Stephanie had just begun to break through some of his barriers. Of course all that happened before Victoria… _oh why did I have to think about her now?_

“Come back to the house and take a shower,” suggested Stephanie. “The plumbing in the main bathroom is OK, or you can take a bath if you prefer. I love a nice long soak myself.”

Fraser cleared his throat and finally turned to look at her. An image of her in the bath had popped into his head and he desperately tried to clear his mind.

“Thank you kindly, but I can use the washing facilities back at the Consulate,” he replied. “Besides, I have not brought clean apparel with me.”

“I can find you a change of clothes,” Stephanie smiled.

Fraser was actually grateful for the opportunity to freshen up, so he accepted her offer. He hadn’t been looking forward to walking all the way back to the Consulate in the searing heat. Normal Chicago summer temperatures felt too warm to him, so he had been struggling with the unseasonal highs of the last week or so. He had also been concerned about encountering Inspector Thatcher in such a filthy state. His superior officer would not have approved at all and would most likely have given him a lecture on bringing the image of the RCMP into disrepute.

As the warm water washed the last of the shampoo from his hair Fraser found himself thinking about Victoria for the second time that afternoon. He started to wonder what might have happened if Stephanie hadn’t left Chicago and they’d still been together when Victoria had walked back into his life. Maybe if he’d been six months into a relationship with Stephanie then none of it would have happened? Or would it…he spun the scenarios round and round in his head. 

_Would I have cheated on Stephanie?_

He leaned back heavily on the cold tiles of the shower cubicle and forced down a wave of nausea.

_Would I? Did I feel so guilty about what I’d done to Victoria that I would still have allowed her to do what she did if I’d been in a loving relationship with Stephanie at that time?_

He hung his head forward and breathed out slowly. He was suddenly aware that the temperature of the water running down his back had dropped and the coolness helped focus his thoughts.

_No. No, I’m not that man. I was weak and Victoria took advantage of that, but in different circumstances it would not have happened._

Fraser took two deep breaths and finished his shower before the hot water ran out completely. With the towel wrapped tightly around his waist he walked back to the bedroom where Stephanie had promised to leave out some clean clothes, only to almost walk straight into her as she was coming out of the door.

“Oh, ah…” he mumbled. He felt very self-conscious standing half naked in front of her, but there was nowhere to hide.

Stephanie smiled and it took all of her self-control not to say ‘Wow!’ Instead she said. “I’ve found a brand new pair of sweat pants my father never wore.”

“Thank…thank you kindly,” replied Fraser. He coated his lower lip with his tongue and contemplated his next move. He could see in her eyes that she was having the same thoughts as he was. “Oh, you put a Band-Aid on that cut,” he said, nodding to her injured arm. He was going to offer to do it for her, but she obviously hadn’t needed his help. He was grateful, though, that it had provided something for him to say to break the awkward silence. 

“Yes, it’s not so bad,” Stephanie replied. “Um, there’s a t-shirt there for you too,” she continued. “It might be a little tight. It’s red; I thought you might like that.” She giggled. She was aware that she was rambling about t-shirts just so she didn’t have to leave, but it was all she could think to do at that moment. The old Stephanie wouldn’t have hesitated, she realised. _The old me used to know what she wanted and how to get it…_

Fraser nodded and smiled. Inside he was yelling at himself to do something; touch her…kiss her…something, but he lost his chance as Stephanie walked away.

Stephanie busied herself downstairs preparing Mia’s dinner, trying to keep her mind off Fraser. It had been wonderful having him here today. Besides finally feeling like progress had been made on renovating the house, it had been great just to have some adult company. She glanced at the clock on her kitchen wall; Heidi would be bringing Mia home soon. She thought about asking Fraser to stay for dinner again; old memories were resurfacing…old feelings and it felt good, but she was scared of pushing him away if she moved too fast. She wasn’t even sure if trying to pick up where they’d left off was a good idea anyway; so much had changed. Slowly was definitely the right way forward for now, she decided.

“Thank you for the clothes.” Fraser’s voice made her jump. “I’m terribly sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” he said.

Stephanie laughed and blushed. “It’s OK,” she replied. “I put your dirty clothes in a bag, it’s by the door,” she added.

“I should, um…” Fraser began, glancing over to the door. “I should probably be getting back to the Consulate.”

Stephanie thought she detected a hint of disappointment in his voice, or maybe that was just wishful thinking. 

“Constable Turnbull has been looking after Diefenbaker for me today and I’m slightly nervous about the fallout from that particular situation,” Fraser explained.

Stephanie laughed. She had not yet met Turnbull, but Fraser had told her a few stories while they’d been working and she wasn’t sure if she ever wanted to meet him. “Thank you so much for your help today,” she said, wiping her hands on a cloth. “I’m so happy to finally see the back of that stupid orangery.” She walked over to him and kissed his cheek.

Fraser blushed. He tried to think of something to say, but he couldn’t form any words. 

Stephanie stayed close to him; lingering for longer than was necessary, hoping that he’d do something that would take the decision out of her hands, but nothing happened and the moment became too awkward. She hung her head in acceptance and turned away, but suddenly Fraser’s hand was cupping the side of her face. She drew a sharp breath and leaned into his touch, biting her lower lip in anticipation.

Fraser’s mind was racing; was he doing the right thing? He wasn’t doing anything they hadn’t done before and if he was reading her right then she wanted this now too…although he wasn’t always good at reading signals in these situations. There was no going back now, though and turning his head slightly, he closed his eyes and kissed her.


	3. Chapter 3

"Fraser...Fraser...Fraserrrr!" Ray sighed. He'd been talking about a case for the last five minutes, but Fraser was clearly not listening. "So...d'ya think the alien from outer space is our perp?" he asked.

"Mmmhmm," nodded Fraser. Then he suddenly realised what his partner had said and turned to look at him, his brow furrowed in confusion. "Alien?" He repeated, incredulously.

"Ah, so ya were listenin' then," grinned Ray.

"I'm terribly sorry, Ray," replied Fraser, tugging at his left earlobe. "I'm somewhat distracted this morning."

"Yeah, I noticed," replied Ray, rolling his eyes. 

"What were you saying about the perpetrator?" asked Fraser.

"Mort said the guy was dead before he wound up at the bottom of Lake Michigan, so that makes the girlfriend's alibi..." began Ray, but he noticed his buddy’s eyes had that glazed look again and realised it wasn't worth discussing this now. "Guess ya had a good time with Stephanie Cabot yesterday, then," he said with a wink.

The mention of Stephanie’s name brought Fraser out of his trance. "Ah, um, yes. That is..." he stumbled over his words.

"Greatness," Ray grinned. "So...tell me all about it. What did ya get up to?"

"Well," began Fraser, "well, I demolished her orangery."

Ray nearly spat coffee all over his desk. "What?" he exclaimed. "Is that some kinda crazy Canadian euphonium? Like, er, like… "

"Um, I believe the word you are looking for is euphemism, Ray," Fraser said quickly, before his partner had the chance to think of a crude phrase. "And no, it is not. My day yesterday involved assisting Miss Cabot with the demolition of a large greenhouse in the grounds of her home."

"Oh," replied Ray, somewhat disappointed. He was desperate to find out more about Stephanie so he started probing. “So, er, she didn’t have a kid when you knew her before?” 

“No,” replied Fraser. “She had chosen to devote her life to rescuing animals in need at that time,” he continued, “But she became pregnant while working in Kenya.”

“Definitely not your kid, then?” Ray asked with a twinkle in his eye.

“No, Ray. That would be impossible for a number of reasons,” replied Fraser with a sigh. He wished his friend would drop the subject. His mind was racing after he and Stephanie had kissed the night before and he wasn’t sure what to do. He had been hoping she would call him, although he’d left the Consulate early to meet Ray. _Perhaps she left a message with Turnbull?_ He pondered. _Or perhaps she’s expecting me to call her first?_

“D’ya wanna call her?” asked Ray suddenly, startling Fraser. It was as if he could read his buddy’s mind. “Here, use my phone.”

Fraser looked at the phone, but did not take it from Ray. “I was considering doing just that,” he admitted, “and thank you kindly, but I think we should go and speak to Alistair Dewbrey’s girlfriend again first.” Fraser deliberately brought the subject back to the case Ray was working on.

“Yeah, sure,” agreed Ray. He slapped Fraser affectionately on the back; he really felt sorry for his buddy. Fraser didn’t have a great track record with women, so Ray completely understood why he was hesitating now; he didn’t want to screw this one up. “You’ll figure it out,” Ray said with a supportive smile.

Fraser just nodded and returned a lopsided half-smile.

xXxXx

“Mind your head there,” Ray sneered as he helped his new prisoner into the back of the GTO.

“Nice work, Ray,” nodded Fraser, approvingly.

“A first year cadet could’ve figured this one out,” replied Ray with a shrug. “Dewbrey was cheatin’ on her so she tied him up, shot him, drove his body fifteen miles and dumped it in the lake. Then she tried to blame the whole thing on her own sister.”

“Hmmm,” agreed Fraser. “Well, when you put it like that…”

“I can’t believe you were fallin’ for her sob story,” continued Ray.

“I can assure you that I did not fall for anyone…er, anything,” replied Fraser, quickly correcting his Freudian slip, but of course Ray had already noticed it.

“If ya say so, buddy,” grinned Ray. He was about to get into the car when his phone rang. “Vecchio,” he snapped. “OK,” he said and slid the phone across the roof of the GTO to Fraser. “It’s for you.”

“Oh,” replied Fraser in surprise. “Good morning, Constable Benton Fraser speaking,” he introduced himself to the caller. Ray saw his face light up when he realised it was Stephanie Cabot.

Stephanie explained that Francesca Vecchio had given her Ray’s cell number and she apologised for calling him.

“That’s quite alright,” replied Fraser, turning his head slightly so as to invoke some degree of privacy from his grinning partner. “I was hoping you’d call,” he added. 

Stephanie asked if he was available that afternoon as she needed his help with something. She didn’t go into details, but insisted it wasn’t important if Fraser was busy with work.

“Um, well Ray has just made an arrest in the case we’ve been working on,” Fraser explained, “so I suppose I am available this afternoon now, although I do need to be at the Consulate this evening for dinner with the Japanese Ambassador.”

Ray waited patiently until Fraser had finished talking to Stephanie. “Everythin’ OK?” he asked as Fraser handed his phone back.

“Yes, thank you,” replied Fraser. “Stephanie has requested my assistance again this afternoon, if you’ll allow it.”

“If I’ll allow it?” repeated Ray with a laugh. “No, you’re grounded! Of course you can go, Fraser.”

“It’s just that the whole of my time today was allocated to liaising with the Chicago Police Department. More specifically, with you,” explained Fraser. 

“Case is closed,” replied Ray, nodding to his prisoner who was becoming visibly more nervous by the minute as she had a lupine guard in the shape of Diefenbaker sitting next to her on the back seat of the car. “I ain’t gonna tell the Ice Queen if ya wanna skip class and, er, meet up with your girlfriend,” he added with a wink.

Fraser decided it wasn’t worth protesting against his partner’s comments. “Thank you kindly,” he replied. He leaned into the car. “Dief, are you coming?” he asked the wolf and Dief jumped up and out through the window, much to the relief of the prisoner.

“Have fun; don’t do anythin’ I wouldn’t do,” grinned Ray and Fraser responded with a wave as he walked off.

xXxXx

It didn’t take long for Fraser and Dief to get to Stephanie’s. She was waiting at the gate for him and smiled as he approached. “Hi,” she said, leaning down to pat Dief on the back. “Don’t look so worried,” she added, noticing Fraser’s concerned look. “Actually, I may have lured you here under false pretences,” she said, looking a little sheepish.

Fraser stood in stunned silence.

“I packed a picnic,” Stephanie said, by way of explanation.

Fraser was none the wiser.

“Come with me,” smiled Stephanie and she grabbed his hand. 

They walked together through the sprawling grounds of the estate, past the remains of the orangery and down the hill to the stable blocks. As they got closer Fraser could see that two of the horses were fully tacked and tied up outside, happily munching hay from a net.

“I want to ride out with you this afternoon,” Stephanie said with a smile. “This is Bessie and this is Porthos; I thought he’d be perfect for you,” she added, rubbing both of the animals’ noses.

Dief barked excitedly. He enjoyed the company of other animals, even horses. He’d found some horses had taken a dislike to him in the past, but these two seemed friendly enough and the prospect of a picnic was making his mouth water with anticipation.

“I think your wolf agrees with me,” smiled Stephanie. “So, what do you say?”

“I’d love to,” replied Fraser. “He’s a magnificent specimen,” he added. Porthos was a tall, chestnut thoroughbred with a dark sweeping mane and Fraser couldn’t wait to ride him. 

“We think he’s about twenty two, or twenty three,” explained Stephanie. “I rescued him from racing stables about seven years ago. They’d treated him so badly; he still has scars.” Stephanie ran her hand across Porthos’ shoulder to show him.

Fraser nodded sadly; he could see the evidence of abuse and neglect. “That’s terrible,” he said. “I can see you’ve taken good care of him though.”

“We thought he was going to go lame while I was in Africa,” said Stephanie, turning her attentions to the horse she would be riding. “Daddy found the best vet in Chicago for him though and he’s fine now.”

Fraser lifted Porthos’ legs one at a time and examined his hooves, nodding in approval at their condition. “Do you have a particular location in mind for our picnic?” he asked.

“Not really,” replied Stephanie as she checked the saddle on Bessie. “There’s some beautiful parkland around here. I own most of it.” She looked slightly embarrassed at that statement and shrugged coyly. “Anyway, I just thought we’d see how far we get. Heidi has Mia until four o’clock.”

Fraser glanced at his watch. Suddenly he felt a pang of guilt. He’d left Ray with the report to write on the arrest from this morning and Turnbull was no doubt getting all kinds of abuse from Inspector Thatcher as she stressed about tonight’s visit from the Japanese Ambassador, yet here he was about to spend a lovely afternoon with a beautiful woman. 

Before he had chance to think about it too much, Stephanie was unbuttoning his brown uniform jacket. “What…what are you doing?” asked Fraser.

“You’re a little overdressed,” replied Stephanie with a smile. “It’s far too hot for all these layers and besides, I don’t want to go on a picnic with Constable Fraser, RCMP; I want to go with Benton.” 

Fraser stood frozen to the spot as she pulled his jacket from his shoulders. 

Dief barked and circled around them. He liked Stephanie; she didn’t procrastinate like so many other humans and she had Fraser exactly where she wanted him. Dief really admired her for that; he was taking notes.

Fraser looked down at him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. It is already two degrees warmer than yesterday,” he pointed out to his wolf. “The prospect of riding in just shirtsleeves is quite appealing.”

Stephanie giggled at Fraser talking to Dief; she’d forgotten that he did that. It was so endearing. She always spoke to animals herself, it was comforting to her somehow and she truly believed that they understood her, even the baby elephants in Kenya.

Finally, she removed his tie and stepped back to admire her handiwork. “That’s better,” smiled Stephanie. Fraser’s blue eyes sparkled in the sunlight and she could have stood and stared at him all afternoon. She really wanted to ride, though and she realised she was making Fraser feel uncomfortable. “Let’s go,” she said and quickly stole a kiss, giggling at his startled reaction.

Stephanie loaded the picnic into their saddlebags and they set off across the fields at a gentle pace. Fraser watched Stephanie in the saddle. She was a natural rider, clearly very experienced and Bessie responded to her exactly as she wanted. Porthos was doing a good job at keeping up with the much younger horse, although Fraser noticed there were moments when the animal’s age and condition showed.

When the path was wide enough they were able to ride side by side and talk. Fraser tried to explain why the Detective currently known as Ray Vecchio was not the same man she’d met four years ago, without going into too much detail. “I’m sorry, that’s as much as I can tell you,” said Fraser.

Diefenbaker ran off in front chasing squirrels and Fraser was pleased to see his companion’s fitness level was not quite as poor as he liked to make out.

Stephanie laughed at Dief’s enthusiasm. “I know he’s a wolf and hunting is in his nature, but…but he’s not going to hurt those squirrels, is he?” she asked. 

“Of course not,” replied Fraser, reassuringly. He glanced ahead and was very glad at that moment that Stephanie did not have what Ray referred to as his Super Mountie sense of sight.

“Let’s give these two beauties a workout,” said Stephanie with a twinkle in her eye. “Race you to the trees!” she called out and before Fraser had a chance to object, she’d taken Bessie to a canter and was quickly putting distance between them. Porthos needed little encouragement to match his stablemate’s pace and Fraser was alongside them within minutes.

Stephanie wasn’t going to be beaten, though and with a grin over her shoulder at Fraser, she pushed Bessie to a gallop. Although Fraser could feel that Porthos wanted to go with them, he held him back; he was starting to get concerned about the older animal’s fitness, especially in the heat. 

Stephanie was suddenly aware that the race was over. Slightly disappointed, she pulled up and turned Bessie around in one quick movement. Unfortunately, Bessie was taken by surprise by the sudden change of pace and direction and lost her footing, stumbling sideways. Stephanie tried to hold on, but she couldn’t and she tumbled to the ground with a yell.

Fraser saw the whole thing happen and his blood ran cold. “Stephanie!” he cried out. Now Porthos was the least of his worries and he raced the horse over to where Stephanie lay on the hard ground. Before Porthos had even come to a stop, Fraser leapt off and ran over to her. 

“I’m OK,” Stephanie said in a shaky voice as he dropped to his knees beside her.

“Just lie still for a moment,” he said placing his hands gently on her shoulders. “Catch your breath.”

“I said I’m OK,” replied Stephanie. Dief affectionately licked her face as she pushed herself up to a sitting position. 

“Careful,” urged Fraser. “Did you hit your head?” 

“No,” she replied. “I’ve fallen off enough horses over the years, I know what to do.”

“Hmm,” Fraser frowned. “You would tell me if anything hurt, wouldn’t you?” he said taking her hand and helping her to her feet.

“Of course!” exclaimed Stephanie. “Benton, I don’t have a concussion and I don’t have any broken bones. The only thing that hurts is my pride,” she added, curtly. She started brushing some of the dust and dry grass from herself and then looked up to see the concern on his face. “I’m fine, really,” she assured him, her voice much softer now. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”

Fraser realised he was making too much fuss, but for one terrible, fleeting moment he’d thought he’d lost her before she was even his to lose. “When I saw you fall…” he began, but he didn’t finish his sentence. Instead, he brought his right hand up to her face and brushed the back of his fingers against her soft skin before capturing her cheek in a gentle grasp and pulling her towards him for a kiss. 

Stephanie brought her arm up and around his waist, pressing herself closer to him as they kissed. Suddenly she let out a yelp and they had to break apart. “Sorry,” she muttered. “I think I may have a few bruises after all.”

Fraser nodded and looked around. “Well, perhaps here would be a good spot for our picnic?” he suggested. “It appears that Porthos and Bessie are quite at home here.”

Stephanie glanced past him and saw the two horses standing side by side eating the only patch of green grass in sight. “Alright,” she agreed. “I’ll be fine after a little rest. I’ll use the ice from the champagne bucket to keep the swelling in check.”

“You brought champagne?” asked Fraser in surprise.

“Well, it’s sparkling lemonade, actually,” she explained, “but I thought we’d be in need of an ice cold drink by now.”

“And you were correct,” replied Fraser as he walked over to the horses. He had worked up quite a sweat and although he’d been grateful for the shade of his hat during the ride, he was longing for the familiar, frozen landscape of his home in the Yukon.

They set up the picnic under the shade of a tree and whiled away the next hour eating, drinking and talking. Stephanie iced her bruised elbow; she had been surprised at how swollen it was when she’d rolled up her shirtsleeve, but Fraser had been able to make it more comfortable for her.

Dief had worked up quite an appetite and he ate whatever was on offer and drank a lot of water; before yawning and settling down with his head on his paws for a nap.

After they’d finished eating, Fraser lay back on the rug with his hands behind his head. The feel of the warm sun on his face was making him sleepy.

Stephanie lay next to him, her head propped up on her good elbow, watching his breathing slow as he relaxed. She studied his face; every line, the soft contours of his lips, that tiny scar on his jawline. He’d hardly aged at all in the years they’d been apart and she couldn’t help the smile that danced at her lips as she remembered seeing that face for the first time.

Fraser opened one eye and looked at her with half a frown. “Do I have something on my face?” he asked, bringing his hand up to brush away whatever it was. “Or stuck in my teeth?”

“No, silly,” laughed Stephanie.

“Then…then what were you looking at?” Fraser asked her innocently.

Stephanie shook her head and smiled. She didn’t reply to his question with words. Instead she leaned forward and kissed him again. This time she didn’t hold back and Fraser responded by pulling her on top of him. 

They kissed more passionately than they ever had before and Fraser was engulfed by feelings he hadn’t had for a long time. He forgot where he was for a moment, allowing himself to feel as free and uninhibited as he ever had. 

Then, without warning, Stephanie pulled away and sat up, straddling his torso. She was panting and smiling. “Don’t you ever come up for air?” she asked with a giggle. She brushed her long blonde hair away from her face and bit down on her lower lip, trying to bring her mind back from the wonderful place it had occupied for the past few minutes.

“I’m so terribly sorry,” Fraser replied. “I practice the technique known as circular breathing. It’s useful for playing long passages on woodwind or brass instruments.”

Stephanie burst into giggles. “Is that what you were thinking about just then?” she asked. “Playing a trumpet?”

“I’ve never learnt to play the trumpet,” replied Fraser with a straight face. “Although Alice Anderson, the school swimming instructor in Tuktoyaktuk, once attempted to teach me the flugelhorn as she needed someone to accompany her during a performance of…”

Stephanie silenced him with a single finger placed over his lips. She didn’t care about Alice Anderson, or the flugelhorn, whatever that was. She knew exactly what she wanted and she wanted it now. She moved her finger slowly from his lips and down his throat to his chest. She’d already unfastened his top button back at the stables when she’d removed his tie and at some point during the afternoon he’d opened the second button, but it wasn’t enough for Stephanie and she began undoing more buttons as quickly as she could. Her eyes remained fixated on his face and she licked her lips in anticipation.

Fraser’s breath quickened as she worked. “What…what are you doing?” he asked, his voice low and husky. He didn’t try to stop her, although inside a voice was screaming at him to do just that.

Stephanie still didn’t speak. She had all his buttons undone now and she tugged his shirt out from the waistband of his jeans until his bare chest was on full display. She rubbed her hands over the smooth skin and smiled seductively.

Fraser started to panic. He wanted this as much as she did, but they couldn’t…not now, not here. “Stephanie…” he began.

“Sshhh,” she urged and pulled him to a sitting position, wrapping her legs around his back and trying to kiss him again, but he pushed her away.

“No,” he said, “no, we can’t.”

“Why not?” exclaimed Stephanie. She quickly clambered off him and sat with her knees up under her chin. “But I thought…I thought…” her voice cracked as she tried not to cry.

“Not here,” Fraser tried to explain. “Engaging in lascivious behaviour in a public place is an offence under the Illinois Criminal Code and if we were caught committing a lewd act in public then I’m afraid the consequences could be dire.”

Stephanie sat opened mouthed as he spoke. She wanted to be angry with him, she wanted to be hurt, but then she looked at his face and saw that he was being completely genuine and she just couldn’t be mad at him. Instead of crying she spluttered out a laugh. “You...I…you…I…” she couldn’t even form a sentence. “Oh, Benton,” she said and scrambled over to hug him, trembling with laughter.

“I’m sorry,” mumbled Fraser. He wasn’t quite sure what else to say. His heart was pounding and his head was spinning and there was Stephanie in his arms. He hugged her tightly and kissed her hair. “It’s not that I don’t want to…”

“It’s OK,” replied Stephanie. “I’m not an exhibitionist or anything; I…I don’t know what I was thinking…” she trailed off. “I’d probably have stopped way before we began, um, committing a lewd act anyway,” she added, giggling at how weird it felt to say those words. “Maybe we should go straight home?” she suggested, hopefully.

Fraser nodded. “I hate to mention it, but we need to return now anyway,” he said as he started to refasten his shirt buttons. “Mia’s nanny will be returning with her soon.”

Stephanie sighed. For a short time she’d forgotten all about Mia; she’d forgotten she was a single parent and that she had responsibilities and she’d just been enjoying herself. Now she felt guilty and angry and overwhelmed all at once. “Yes, you’re right,” she said and they quickly packed their things away and rode back to the house.

xXxXx

By the time Fraser and Stephanie had finished getting the horses back into the stables, Heidi’s rather battered old car was pulling into the long driveway.

“She needs changing,” announced the nanny, abruptly and she handed Mia over to Stephanie. “And today is the day for me to get paid,” she added, following them into the house. Heidi had a strong Eastern European accent and she often constructed sentences in the slightly muddled way that was common for someone for whom English was not their first language.

Fraser sensed a sudden atmosphere between the two women. Stephanie had become agitated, although she was trying not to show it. Mia appeared to sense her mother’s mood and started to cry.

“Let me change Mia’s diaper,” said Fraser, setting his hat down on the hall table.

Stephanie gratefully handed over her daughter. “Thank you,” she replied. “It’s OK, Benton,” she added, trying somewhat unconvincingly to reassure him.

Fraser nodded and took Mia upstairs, singing her a lullaby to calm her. “Now, let’s find you a nice new diaper,” he said, laying her on the bed as Dief made himself comfortable on a soft rug that lay on the floor. 

Fraser quickly found everything he needed. “Of course your Mommy uses traditional towelling diapers,” he smiled when he found them. “Those appalling disposable ones are cluttering landfill sites the world over.”

Fraser could hear Stephanie and Heidi talking downstairs and Heidi’s voice was becoming louder. Fraser tried to block out their conversation as he didn’t want to eavesdrop, but he was concerned that they appeared to be arguing now. He rolled up his sleeves and turned his attention back to Mia.

Mia seemed happier than she had a few moments ago and Fraser kept her amused with the puffin face as he pulled off her tiny leggings, but then suddenly she started screaming. “Oh dear,” said Fraser, “what’s the matter?” He soon realised what was causing her so much distress. “Good lord, this diaper hasn’t been changed for hours!” he said in disgust. It was very wet and soiled and Mia’s delicate skin had become red and sore.

“Sshhh,” Fraser tried to soothe her as he cleaned her up. He felt so sorry for the tiny child.

Diefenbaker yapped questioningly.

“I don’t know?” replied Fraser. “I have no idea how a professional childcare expert could have allowed her to get into this state.”

He found some cream, smiling when he saw it was a product made of entirely natural ingredients from a company who never used animal testing. He admired Stephanie for sticking to her principles, even though this cream probably cost four times as much as the leading brand. He made a mental note to show her how to make her own, which would be much cheaper and just as effective. Fraser applied the cream liberally to little Mia’s skin. 

“There,” he said with a smile, “that should improve matters. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m just going to have a look at you.” He was concerned that Heidi wasn’t taking good care of her and he didn’t want to concern Stephanie with his thoughts until he could be absolutely sure. Fraser kept talking to Mia as he carefully checked her over for any other worrying signs. He was relieved to see that there wasn’t another mark on her. Perhaps this was a genuine oversight on behalf of the nanny? He thought. Fraser quickly got her dressed before she started to get cold. 

The argument downstairs had suddenly heated up and Fraser couldn’t help hearing what was being said now. It seemed like Stephanie didn’t have the money to pay Heidi and the nanny was not very happy about the situation. Fraser laid a now contented Mia safely in her cot and left Dief watching her while he ran back downstairs.

“Benton,” Stephanie was relieved to see him. “Heidi is refusing to leave.”

“I am owed money for the work I have done,” replied Heidi. “I am not leaving until I get my money and then I never come back here.”

“But I’m going to pay you,” replied Stephanie desperately, “I just need a couple more days. You have to come back tomorrow; I have things to do here, I need you to look after Mia.”

“How much do you need?” asked Fraser quickly before Heidi had chance to reply. He reached for his hat and pulled out some neatly folded money.

“No, Benton!” exclaimed Stephanie. “I’ve told her already that I’ll pay her at the end of the week.”

“This is what you tell me last week,” replied Heidi, angrily. “And still no money.”

“Will this cover it?” Fraser asked, thrusting a bundle of dollar bills into her hand.

Heidi looked stunned; this was the exact amount, she realised.

Fraser crossed to the front door and opened it. “Thank you kindly for having Mia today,” he said. “I trust we will see you again tomorrow?”

Heidi looked again at the cash in her hand and nodded. “Yes. Thank you,” she replied and left.

“I wish you hadn’t done that,” Stephanie said quietly once Fraser had closed the door. 

“It’s quite alright,” replied Fraser. “I carry some US currency now.” The last time they’d spent any time together, Fraser had only ever had Canadian Dollars and often had to borrow money, usually from the real Ray Vecchio. 

“I don’t care what colour your money is,” she snapped at him. She hung her head; she was so ashamed. This was one of the most humiliating experiences she’d ever been through. Stephanie was used to having all the money she could ever want and she’d never had to beg anyone for a few extra days credit before. She couldn’t bear to even look at Fraser right now.

“I’m sorry, but I thought it best under the circumstances,” replied Fraser gently. “As you said yourself, you need her.”

Stephanie nodded; she knew he was right. “Other single moms don’t have nannies, I know that, but I can afford her,” she said quietly. “I just can’t get to any of the money at the moment. It could take months. I don’t know what the lawyers are doing? Why is it taking so long?”

“Legal processes are notoriously slow,” Fraser pointed out. 

Stephanie sighed and Fraser stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her. “Why is my life such a mess?” she asked, leaning her head against his chest.

Fraser held her tightly and pressed a kiss into her blonde hair. 

She lifted her head, gazed into his eyes and smiled. “I guess not everything in my life is so bad right now.”


	4. Chapter 4

Dinner with the Japanese Ambassador was uneventful, for which Fraser was very grateful. He couldn't concentrate on the cultural matters they were supposed to be discussing; his mind kept wandering back to Stephanie. He couldn't shake the feelings from that afternoon. 

Fraser's Japanese was rather rusty, but it transpired that Turnbull had been learning a few phrases especially for the occasion and, aside from a few pronunciation errors, he did very well, impressing their guests. The Ambassador seemed happy to agree to the programme of events Fraser and the Inspector had been working on and Fraser was glad to see that all their hard work had paid off. 

"A toast!" declared the Inspector. "To our new friends." She smiled and downed yet another glass of wine. Turnbull glanced at Fraser, they were both thinking the same thing; the Inspector had already had far too much to drink on an empty stomach.

Inspector Thatcher had organised outside caterers and the Ambassador and his wife were very complimentary about the mix of Japanese and Canadian dishes on offer. Fortunately, Inspector Thatcher stopped slurring her words quite so badly once she had some food inside of her, but Fraser was still nervous and he couldn't help feeling hugely relieved as he waved the Japanese delegation off in their chauffer-driven limousine and shut the sturdy mahogany door of the Consulate. 

Turnbull came running out of the Inspector's office. "Constable Fraser," he began, trying not to show panic. "The Inspector has been taken ill."

Fraser sighed. "How many times has she vomited?" he asked.

"Twice, I believe," replied Turnbull.

"Oh dear," sighed Fraser. He went to the kitchen to make his superior officer something to settle her stomach and a short while later she was heard muttering something about never eating sushi again as Turnbull helped her out to the Consulate car to drive her home. Under normal circumstances the Inspector would never have allowed him to drive the car. It was bad enough when Fraser drove it as if he'd never driven a car before, but she felt so unwell she just wanted to get home to her own bed and she didn't really care how she got there. It transpired that Turnbull's driving habits were worse than Fraser's.

Fraser spent the next two hours cleaning the Inspector's office and the bathroom and clearing away the remains of the dinner before finally sitting down. He glanced at his watch and sighed. He had wanted to call Stephanie, just to see if she was OK and to ask after Mia; hopefully her skin was a little less inflamed and painful by now, but it was far too late and he didn't want to disturb them, so he decided to call her the morning instead.

Dief yawned. 

"I think that's a very good idea," agreed Fraser. He went to the closet to hang up his uniform.

"Hello, Son," came the voice of Bob Fraser.

Fraser smiled to himself; he'd been hoping his father would be there. Fraser was in just his trousers and undershirt now. The red serge of his dress uniform had been almost unbearable through dinner in the warm summer evening temperatures. Even Turnbull had, at one point, broken quite a sweat, although Fraser wasn't sure if that was just the effects of the firecracker chilli prawns. 

As he stepped through the back of his closet, Fraser could hear the sound of a crackling fire. "A little under dressed, aren't you, Benton?" commented Bob.

"Good grief, Dad," Benton exclaimed. "It's over twenty degrees!"

"Not in here it's not," replied Bob.

Benton was suddenly aware of the drop in temperature. He pulled up a wooden, three-legged stool and sat in front of the fire, warming his hands in the heat of the flames.

His father was sitting on another stool, darning socks. “It’s a dying art, you know,” said Bob.

“What is?”

“Darning socks,” explained Bob.

“Ah. Right you are,” nodded Benton.

“Your mother had great skill with a needle and thread,” continued Bob. “There’s nothing more satisfying than the sight of the woman you love darning your socks.”

“That’s a very old fashioned and, if I might say so, rather sexist point of view, Dad,” frowned Benton.

“Oh, I was just as happy watching her chopping wood or fixing the snowmobile,” replied Bob, “but there’s something innately comforting about knowing that someone’s there if you need them and, equally, in knowing that you have someone who needs you.”

Benton sighed. “I don’t think Stephanie really needs me,” he said. “I assume that’s what you were alluding to.”

Bob shrugged. “She needed you yesterday and this afternoon,” he pointed out, “and that little baby needs a father.”

“The baby already has a father…somewhere,” began Benton. “Are you suggesting I should pursue a relationship with Stephanie because she is a single parent?” he asked, incredulously. “It’s almost the Twenty First Century, Dad! I’m quite certain that she is perfectly capable of raising her daughter on her own.”

“Oh I don’t doubt that for a minute,” agreed Bob, “she is a resourceful and capable young lady, but it’s also not a reason for not pursuing her.”

“Are you giving me advice on…on relationships, Dad?” Benton asked in surprise. This conversation was beginning to make him uncomfortable and he wasn’t entirely sure what point his father was trying to make anyway. “We do appear to be compatible in many ways,” Benton started voicing his thoughts. “We have a lot of common interests and I’d have no qualms about taking on joint parental responsibilities for Mia, if it were to come to that, but…” he trailed off. 

Bob put the socks and darning needle down on a chair and gave his son his full attention. “But?” he prompted.

“Perhaps if we’d become reacquainted under different circumstances I wouldn’t be so…” Benton paused to think of a suitable word. “Confused,” he said, finally. “Four years ago I certainly did not have any doubts about the merits of engaging with her romantically.”

“So what’s changed now?” asked Bob, “apart from the calendar year.”

“She’s vulnerable right now,” replied Benton. “I don’t think she realises how much, actually. I don’t want to take advantage of her. I cannot be certain that her apparent feelings for me don’t stem from her current need for emotional support. She does need someone at this juncture and, well, I’m there, but it could equally be, for example, Ray, or Constable Turnbull providing companionship.”

“Turnbull is an idiot,” scoffed Bob, “and don’t let the Yank get his hands on your girl.”

Benton dropped his head into his hands. What on earth had made him think his father was the person to talk to about all this? Bob didn’t seem to understand what was going through his mind and why would he? Bob Fraser only ever loved one woman and that was Caroline Fraser, Benton’s mother. Once she had been taken away from him, no woman would ever match up to her. “All I’m trying to say, Dad, is that once her life calms down, she will most likely not want to be with me anymore.” Benton said and he stood up to leave.

“You have no way of knowing that, Son,” replied Bob “and there’s no point in second guessing what might happen in the future. If I’d have known how little time I was going to have with your mother, do think I wouldn’t have bothered with the Great Double Douglas Fir Telescoping Bank Shot and just let Buck Frobisher have her? Of course not!”

Benton rubbed at his left eyebrow with his thumbnail. “I suppose I’m just afraid of….” he began, but he couldn’t bring himself to say what he was thinking.

“Stephanie Cabot is not like that other woman,” replied Bob, sternly. He didn’t want to say the name Victoria Metcalfe, he couldn’t cope with the level of hate just her name invoked in him. “She’s gone,” he continued. “Forget about her, Son.”

Benton’s eyes were suddenly moist with tears. “It’s not that easy, Dad.”

xXxXxXx

Later, as Fraser lay in his so-called bed listening to Diefenbaker snoring, he was still going over and over things in his mind. 

_What's wrong with me? No one was ever going to see us this afternoon except maybe a few cows in the adjoining field. Why couldn't I have just allowed myself that one beautiful moment?_

He wondered if Ray would be acting like this. Ray had been damaged by the pain of his divorce, but if he had the opportunity of a relationship with a beautiful woman who seemed to like him as much as he liked her, would Ray be having all these doubts?

 _Maybe I should call Ray? This is exactly the kind of thing he would want to talk to me about if our roles were reversed. He finds it so easy to talk about his feelings, though._

The chat Fraser had earlier with his father had only reminded him how hard he found it to open up to people; even to the people he loved. He glanced at the clock and realised how late it was. Calling Ray now would be unfair he concluded and instead he resolved to talk to his friend tomorrow.

Despite the warm night making him feel uncomfortable in bed, it wasn’t long before Fraser was fast asleep. 

It was just after one in the morning when the loud ringing of the telephone wrenched him from his slumber and he sat bolt upright, wondering who could be calling the Consulate at this hour. He leapt out of bed and crossed to his desk to answer it, worried that it might be Inspector Thatcher calling to say she was feeling even more unwell.

“You have reached the Canadian Consulate,” began Fraser, “Constable Benton…” but he didn’t get a chance to finish his usual greeting.

“Benton!” It was Stephanie and she sounded very distressed. “Oh god, Benton, there’s a fire…the stables!”

“Slow down,” urged Fraser. “A fire! Are you alright? Are you safe?”

“I’m OK, I’m OK,” she panted, “the Fire Department are here…” but her talking turned into coughing.

Fraser had heard enough. “Stephanie, it’s alright, I’m on my way,” he said.

Within minutes Fraser was dressed in jeans and a dark blue shirt and was driving the Consular car through the streets of Chicago, grateful that Turnbull had returned it in one piece. As he approached Stephanie’s sprawling house he could see flames lighting up the night sky and a plume of smoke billowing into the air. He drove the car down the hill towards the stable block, parking it against a hedge at a safe distance from the fire. 

Stephanie ran over to him as soon as he got out of the car. Her face was smeared with black soot and her hair was wild. She threw herself into Fraser’s arms and he held her tightly. “What happened?” he asked urgently.

“I don’t know?” replied Stephanie. “Mia woke me up and then I saw the flames from the window.”

“Where is Mia?” asked Fraser, anxiously.

“She’s OK, she went back to sleep,” replied Stephanie. “I’ve been back to the house to check on her already.” Stephanie had to stop talking to cough and she covered her mouth with her hand as the spasms coursed through her lungs.

“You’ve inhaled smoke,” stated Fraser with concern, “you need to be examined by a doctor.”

Steph started to protest, but then a firefighter walked over to them. “I think we’ve got it under control now,” he said, glancing back over his shoulder to his colleagues who were still spraying water on the remains of the wooden structure. “It looks like an electrical spark started it off and then all that hay and straw just went up and the fire took hold of the building. We’ll have to get an investigation team out here in the morning to be certain, but I’ve seen enough of these things to be pretty sure.”

“Thank you kindly,” said Fraser. “I’m going to take Miss Cabot to the hospital now.”

The firefighter nodded and returned to help the rest of his crew finish the job.

“I’m not going to the hospital,” stated Stephanie. “I was only in there for a few minutes, just long enough to get the horses out; they were so scared. Romeo had already kicked his way out by the time I got there and King ran as soon as I could get his gate open. Bessie was trapped by flames, but I got to her quickly. Porthos was fighting me, though; he refused to leave. I had to get a rope around him and drag him out of there.”

Stephanie was trembling now and Fraser wrapped his arms around her again. “You should have waited until the fire crew arrived,” he said. “You could have been…hurt.”

“I couldn’t leave them in there,” replied Stephanie.

“I know,” whispered Fraser. He wouldn’t have expected anything less from her and he would have done exactly the same in her position. “Where are they now?” he asked.

“I’ve put them in the old stable block,” explained Stephanie. “It’s falling down, but I don’t have anywhere else. We should go and check on them; I think Bessie may have some burns. I couldn’t really see properly and she wouldn’t let me go near her.”

They ran across the yard to the old building. Stephanie’s previous statement had been quite accurate; it did look as though it could fall down at any moment, although it was secure for now. The horses were still all very distressed and making a lot of noise.

Stephanie led Fraser to the stall where she’d left Bessie. There was a single bulb hanging from the ceiling which gave off just about enough light to see. Fraser glanced up at it; he could easily see how the fire in the other block could have started if this was evidence of the state of the wiring.

Stephanie tried to calm the frightened mare. “Sshhh, it’s alright,” she said and reached out a hand to stroke her mane, but Bessie snorted, shook her head and kicked out at Stephanie.

“Stay back,” urged Fraser. He tried to get close enough to Bessie to see her injuries. “Oh dear,” he said. “It does appear that she has sustained burns to her hind quarters. It doesn’t look too serious, but burns are notoriously susceptible to infection.” As he was talking, Fraser had to sidestep Bessie’s hooves as she was very jumpy. “We need to cool her skin with some clean water,” he explained.

“I’ll fill some containers; we have running water down here,” replied Stephanie and she darted out of the stable. 

Fraser winced as he heard her coughing again. He turned his attentions back to Bessie and started talking to her in Inuktitut. Within a few seconds she had stopped kicking and allowed Fraser to stroke her muzzle. “Good girl,” he said as he was finally able to examine her properly. 

Just then, Stephanie ran back in. “Benton, quickly!” she yelled, frantically. “It’s Porthos!” She rushed back outside.

Fraser raced after her, making sure Bessie’s gate was secure as he left. They found Porthos in his stall making a terrible wheezing noise. He was sweating profusely and seemed to be having trouble staying on his feet.

“He wasn’t like this just now,” said Stephanie, the panic obvious in her voice.

“Oh dear,” said Fraser. He and Stephanie stood either side of Porthos and tried to pacify him, but he was clearly very distressed; his coat was cold and clammy and his breathing was shallow and rapid. Fraser rested one hand on the animal’s back and pressed his ear to his body, afraid of what he might hear; unfortunately his worst fears were quickly realised. Without saying anything he walked around to join Stephanie and listened to Porthos’ other lung, hoping that his ears were deceiving him on this occasion, but the noises were even worse on that side. 

Porthos wasn’t happy at all and he tried to kick out, but his front legs just gave way beneath him and he fell forward.

“Porthos!” screamed Stephanie. “Come on, Porthos, get up. Come on.” She had her arm around his neck and tried to encourage him to stand, but he just didn’t have the strength.

Fraser checked Porthos’ pulse, it was erratic and Fraser patted the animal affectionately. He glanced at Stephanie, sighed and braced himself; he was going to have to break this to her gently.

Stephanie already knew there was something terribly wrong by the look on his face. “What…what is it? It’s bad isn’t it,” she said, her voice cracking with emotion.

“He’s inhaled a lot of smoke,” explained Fraser, kneeling next to Stephanie. “His lungs can’t cope with it and his organs are already starting to fail.” 

“What can we do to help him?” she asked, blinking away tears.

Fraser shook his head. “I’m sorry; there’s nothing we can do,” he said.

“I’ll call the vet,” she said and started to get to her feet. “I don’t know how I’m going to pay him, but I’ll…I’ll…”

“It’s too late, there’s nothing anyone can do to help him now,” Fraser interrupted her, holding her by the shoulders.

She tried to shake free of his grasp, but at that moment Porthos’ hind legs gave out and he collapsed onto his side. “Porthos, no!” Stephanie sobbed and knelt down beside him again. She could see now exactly how much effort it was taking the poor animal just to breathe. “Benton, please do something,” she begged. 

Fraser sighed sadly. Only a few hours earlier he’d been riding the magnificent animal in the glorious sunshine and now this had happened. He couldn’t bear to see him suffering like this and it was heartbreaking to watch Stephanie’s anguish.

“There must be something we can do for him,” Stephanie said, desperately.

Fraser took a deep breath and nodded. “There is one thing,” he said, quietly. “Do you have a shotgun?”


	5. Chapter 5

Stephanie slowly opened her eyes and squinted at the sunlight pouring in through the gap in her bedroom curtains. For one wonderful moment she thought it had all been just a terrible nightmare, but that glimmer of hope faded almost immediately as reality hit and she remembered that it was all true. An uncontrollable sob rose up from deep down inside her.

“It’s alright.” Fraser’s voice caught her by surprise and she rolled over to see him sitting in the old chair next to her bed. 

“Hey,” she choked out. Now it was coming back to her; he’d been there with her all night. She remembered drifting in and out of sleep and he’d held her as she cried herself back to sleep. “Thank you for staying,” she said.

Fraser smiled and wrapped her hand in his. “I think you had a good two hours of unbroken sleep that time,” he said. She’d been waking every twenty minutes or so during the night, so Fraser hoped that the last two hours had done her some good. He’d been quite worried about her and there was no way he would have left her alone, not after everything that had happened. 

Grief had completely overwhelmed her and Fraser had had to work hard to keep her focussed. Between the sobbing and screaming she’d been talking a lot about her Dad and Fraser realised that, while she was devastated by the loss of Porthos, the events had acted as a catalyst for her to release all of the emotions she’d been holding onto following her father’s death.

“Mia will be awake soon, I should make her breakfast,” said Stephanie, stifling a yawn.

“She’s fine. She awoke over an hour ago,” replied Fraser. “I fed and changed her and she’s sleeping again.”

“Really? Thanks,” said Stephanie, wondering why Mia had woken up so early. “What time is it?” she asked.

“Nine fifteen,” replied Fraser.

“What?” exclaimed Stephanie, sitting bolt upright. “Benton, you should have woken me; I’ve got so much to do. I need to call someone about…about Porthos…”

“I’ve already taken care of that,” replied Fraser. “Don’t worry.”

“Well I have to get dressed; the Fire Department are coming to do their investigation,” continued Stephanie, flinging back the covers.

“They’re already here; the investigator suggested it wouldn’t take too long,” explained Fraser.

“You have to go to work,” she continued. “I don’t want you to get in trouble with that Inspector of yours on my account.”

“Not today,” smiled Fraser. “I spoke to Turnbull and told him that I would not be reporting for duty. The Inspector is unwell this morning so she will be unaware of my absence.”

“What about your partner?” she asked. “Shouldn’t you be working with him today?”

“Actually Ray will be here shortly,” he answered. “You’ll need to make a Police statement regarding the fire; it’s purely a formality, but a necessary one as we have to rule out the possibility of foul play.”

Stephanie nodded and sighed. “Well I guess you’ve taken care of everything,” she replied curtly. She realised he was trying to help and she was grateful really, but part of her felt like she should have been the one to deal with all of these things. She looked at him and realised that she had to stop trying to do it all. It was OK to let him help; she knew that, but it wasn’t easy for her. “Thank you…for everything,” she smiled. “I’m so sorry about…” she trailed off and her face fell. “I’m sorry about what you had to do last night for Porthos.”

Fraser nodded solemnly. Of course it hadn’t been easy for him; it wasn’t the first time he’d had to assist the passing of an animal suffering in that way and it never got any easier, but Fraser knew he’d done the right thing. Porthos had been in so much pain and distress that there had been no other choice, although the tragedy of that moment would stay with him forever.

“I…I wanted to stay,” Stephanie began, getting out of bed and crossing to the window. “But…I couldn’t bear to watch.”

Fraser walked over to her and stood behind her as she opened the curtains and looked out onto the outside world. “I would have insisted you left anyway; there was no need to stay,” he said, enveloping her in a hug from behind. “And Bessie needed you.”

Stephanie closed her eyes as tears began to fall again. She leaned into the warmth of Fraser’s body and it sent tingles up and down her spine. She spun around in his arms and laid her head against his chest. She wondered what else life was going to throw at her. What had she ever done to deserve all of this?

Fraser felt her start to shake as she broke down again. He knew it was going to take time for her to heal and he suspected there would be many more moments like this. He stroked her hair and talked to her gently until she’d calmed down again.

Stephanie swallowed hard. “I can’t do this anymore,” she whispered. It felt like someone had reached inside her and pulled out her insides and she wanted to disappear somewhere where no one would ever find her.

“It’ll be alright,” Fraser tried to reassure her. “Just take things one day at a time.”

Stephanie nodded and looked up into his blue eyes. _Maybe I will be alright after all…if you’re here to hold me together._ She let that thought hang and suddenly kissed him with intensity and passion. 

Fraser staggered back a step, surprised by the spontaneity of her actions. His first thought was to turn away, but he couldn’t; instead he took her face in his hands and responded with the same level of fervour.

Stephanie forced him to stumble another few steps until she had him exactly where she wanted him and then she pushed him backwards onto the bed. 

Fraser fell back, bouncing on the soft springy mattress and Stephanie climbed on top of him, pinning him down. She was wearing nothing but a pair of short, silk pyjamas that left little to the imagination and Fraser was in awe of her beauty. Stephanie ran her hands through his hair and pressed her lips against his again. She wanted him to take away her pain. She wanted him to make her feel like a woman again; it had been so long since anyone had done that.

“Stephanie,” breathed Fraser, but he wasn’t sure what he was going to say; he was becoming lost in the moment. He closed his eyes and let her take the lead. 

She sat back on her haunches, squeezing her thighs against his hips and lifted her silk top over her head, tossing it onto the pillow. Now she was half naked and Fraser’s body lurched in anticipation, but then he saw the tears were pouring down her face and he suddenly realised that this was not the right time. If they did this now it would just be empty, desperate sex and that wasn’t what either of them wanted. “Stop,” he said, gently.

Stephanie gasped and froze. What was he doing? She didn’t want to stop.

Fraser grabbed her pyjama top and thrust it into her hands. “Not now,” he said.

Stephanie climbed off the bed, threw her top back over her head and broke down. “Why do you keep pushing me away?” she sobbed. “Why?”

Fraser lay back on the bed and covered his face with his hand. Maybe I should have just given into my desires? At least I would have made her happy, if only for a short time. But he knew it would have been wrong. 

Fraser climbed off the bed and walked over to her. “I want it to be right,” he whispered. 

She didn’t turn around; she couldn’t bear to face him. Her arms were folded tightly across her chest and she was breathing deeply, desperately fighting for control.

“Our first time should not be like this,” he tried to explain, wincing as the words left his lips; it hadn’t come out quite how he intended at all.

“Our first time?” Stephanie finally spun round to face him. “For god’s sake Ben, we’re not teenagers!”

He hung his head and let her yell at him, hoping that releasing some more emotion would be good for her.

“What do you want?” she continued, her voice cracking with emotion. “Scented candles? Barry White on the radio? Maybe I should scatter some rose petals on the bed?” She threw her hands up in the air and let out a growl of frustration. “Just go, will you,” she sighed.

Fraser tried to touch her shoulder, but she shrugged him off. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ll be…with the horses.”

xXxXx

Fraser busied himself with Bessie. Her burns were starting to heal and he was glad to see there was no sign of infection. The Fire Investigators talked to him briefly before they left and confirmed their initial suspicions that a fault in the electrical wiring in the stable had caused the fire. There was nothing salvageable from the fire; the wooden buildings had been completely destroyed.

Bessie, Romeo and King all seemed perfectly contented, seemingly oblivious to the drama and tragedy of the night before. Fraser heard a familiar barking noise and looked up to see Diefenbaker walking towards him. He smiled and crouched down to greet his panting wolf who had walked all the way from the Consulate. “Did Constable Turnbull explain why I had to leave in such a hurry?” he asked and Dief yapped an affirmation. Fraser spent a few minutes making a fuss of Dief, making sure he had a huge dish of water to drink, before he heard footsteps.

“Hey, Ben.” It was Stephanie and she had Mia with her. Stephanie’s voice was calm and soft and Fraser noticed that she had done her hair and make-up.

He looked up at her. “Stephanie, I’m sorry,” he began.

“No, I’m sorry,” she interrupted him. “You were right,” she added quietly.

“You don’t have to apologise,” replied Fraser. He walked over and took Mia from her arms, smiling as he was rewarded with a giggle from the baby.

Stephanie nodded and smiled. She couldn’t think straight right now; they would have to talk about it later. “Heidi is late,” she said, deliberately changing the subject. “I don’t know if I should call her or not? I’ve just seen Mia’s diaper rash; I know you mentioned it last night, but I didn’t really pay any attention. She’s never had it that badly before.”

“It is looking a lot better this morning,” replied Fraser.

“If she can’t even change diapers properly then I don’t think I want her looking after my daughter anymore,” sighed Stephanie.

“I’m sure Francesca Vecchio would be happy to look after Mia today,” suggested Fraser. “Would you like me to call her?”

Stephanie shrugged. She’d met Francesca once before, but she’d seemed far too ditzy to be capable of being responsible for a baby. “I don’t know,” she said. “I don’t really want to leave her with a stranger.”

Fraser understood. “Mia’s no trouble, I’m sure we can keep her amused today,” he smiled.

They went back to the house and Stephanie tried to keep busy with some cleaning. Ray arrived a short while later and took Stephanie’s statement. She held herself together as she relived the events of the previous night.

“Sorry ya had to do that,” Ray apologised as she signed the paperwork. “The Fire Department is pretty certain it was an accident though, so, er, this’ll just get filed with their report.”

“Thank you,” replied Stephanie. “Would you like coffee?”

“Sure,” grinned Ray and Stephanie went into the kitchen.

“I’d like to remain here for the rest of the day,” said Fraser when she was out of earshot. 

“No problem,” replied Ray. “Looks like she could do with a friend today.”

“Indeed,” agreed Fraser.

“So, er, you OK?” Ray asked.

“Me? Of course,” nodded Fraser. “I am concerned about Stephanie’s wellbeing, but other than that I’m fine. Thank you for asking.”

“Fraser, ya had to shoot a horse,” Ray pointed out. “Er, I freaked out when my dog got run over, remember?”

“Yes, I remember you telling me that story,” nodded Fraser. “However, I have been in similar situations before, Ray. Unfortunately it is all too common in areas of wilderness. It was the right thing to do; the kindest thing under the circumstances. I am at peace with the situation.” 

Ray knew Fraser wasn’t being completely straight with him; he could tell that the incident had affected his buddy more than he was letting on, but if that’s the way Fraser wanted to play it then that was his choice. Ray would be there for him if and when he needed to talk about it. 

Stephanie returned with Ray’s coffee and the three of them talked for a while. They took it in turns to play on the floor with Mia. Fraser smiled as he saw how natural Ray was with her; he knew Ray had always wanted children with Stella and he hoped his friend would get a chance at parenthood one day soon.

“OK,” said Ray, eventually. “I’d better get this report filed. Welsh is on my back about some, er, some crap or other so I should go deal with it. Call me if ya need anythin’.”

Fraser walked Ray to the door, but he was surprised to find Heidi waiting on the doorstep when he opened it. “Good afternoon,” he greeted her.

“I am late,” she said. “There is a problem for me this morning. I’m truly sorry. I may take Mia now for Miss Cabot.”

“Um, well I’m not sure that…” began Fraser, but Stephanie had heard her voice and came out into the hall.

“What time do you call this?” she demanded.

“I’m sorry,” replied Heidi looking at the floor. “It will not happen again.”

“You’re right about that,” agreed Stephanie. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to let you go. I’m not happy about the state Mia was in when you brought her home yesterday.”

“I don’t understand?” replied Heidi.

“Why don’t we go and sit down to discuss this?” suggested Fraser, eager to diffuse the situation.

“I need this job,” Heidi sounded desperate. “I have to get money to send to my father.”

Stephanie sighed. “I’m not a charity,” she replied. She glanced at Fraser before continuing. “Yesterday, you hadn’t changed Mia’s diaper for hours. It’s unacceptable. I’m paying you to take good care of my daughter for me.”

“But you don’t pay me!” exclaimed Heidi.

“Oh, so that makes it OK for you to neglect her basic needs?” replied Stephanie, incredulously.

“No, no, I did not mean to say that,” Heidi shook her head as she spoke; she did appear genuinely sorry. “Sometimes I say a wrong thing. I have some trouble at the moment; it makes my brain confused.”

“What kind of trouble?” Fraser asked, glancing at Ray. “My friend and I are police officers; is there anything we can do to help?”

The colour drained from Heidi’s face. “No! I do not need Police,” she insisted.

Ray looked at Fraser with his eyebrows raised. His Detective instincts were tingling. “Er, are ya sure about that?” he asked.

“Yes, yes,” reiterated Heidi. “Please, I’m sorry about the diaper; it won’t happen again. I take good care of babies. I made mistake yesterday, but today I look after Mia well for you.”

Stephanie sighed. She felt sorry for Heidi; she seemed like a nice girl and she had been doing a good job up until yesterday. “Alright,” she said. She really wanted some time alone with Fraser this afternoon. “If you could take Mia for a few hours I’d be very grateful, but you’re on probation, do you understand?”

Heidi nodded and smiled. “Thank you, thank you.”

“And of course I’ll pay you,” smiled Stephanie and she beckoned Heidi to follow her into the other room to collect Mia.

“Hmm,” Fraser pondered when they were out of earshot.

“Yeah; hmm is right, buddy,” agreed Ray. “Somethin’ ain’t right with her.”

“I agree,” nodded Fraser. “There’s little we can do at this juncture. I’ll give her one of your business cards; she can call if she needs help.”

Ray moved to get out his wallet, but Fraser held up a hand to stop it. “No need,” he announced. “I have a supply in my hat.”

Ray grinned. “Course ya do,” he said. “Look, I’ve really gotta go. If anyone asks where y’are I’ll cover for ya. Call me if ya need anythin’.”

xXxXx

Stephanie and Fraser spent the afternoon getting the old stable block into a habitable condition for the remaining horses. Fraser checked all the wiring and made some emergency repairs to prevent another disaster, while Stephanie prepared the stalls. She laid fresh straw on the floor and made sure the horses had everything they needed.

Diefenbaker spent the time apparently chatting with Romeo, the young pony. Fraser was pleased to see him making friends.

Eventually Stephanie was satisfied with everything and she sat on an upturned bucket. “Everything was destroyed in there,” she sighed, looking over her shoulder at the burnt out remains of the other stable block. “All the saddles and the tack…I won’t be able to ride until I can afford to replace it all.”

“Have you ever ridden bareback?” asked Fraser, packing away the tools he’d been using.

“Only once when I was a kid,” Stephanie replied. “I didn’t like it; I didn’t feel very secure.”

“I could teach you,” offered Fraser. “The technique is quite simple to master and the rewards can be very satisfying. Do you have any rope? About…so big.” Fraser indicated the diameter he wanted by making a circle with his thumb and forefinger.

“Yes, there’s a big coil of it in the corner,” Stephanie answered, pointing.

Fraser fetched the rope and started cutting it into various lengths with his penknife. Then, as Stephanie watched in amazement, he proceeded to fashion it at lightning speed into an adjustable bridle and reins.

“Shall we try this now?” he asked with a smile. “Bessie can’t be ridden until her injuries have healed, but I think King is eager to get out.”

Stephanie ran over and excitedly flung her arms around Fraser, before going to get King from his stall. Fraser fitted the rope harness over the horse’s head and adjusted it until it was a perfect fit. King was very well behaved; he didn’t mind Fraser fussing over him at all.

“Jump on,” said Fraser and he crouched and locked his hands together to give Stephanie a leg up. “That’s good, now just relax and find your balance,” he encouraged as she tried to get comfortable.

King was a powerful animal; she’d only ridden him a few times before so Stephanie couldn’t help but be a little nervous and she grasped the reins tightly. 

“It’s alright,” smiled Fraser encouragingly, showing her the leading rein in his hand. “I’ve got him. Now, try to sit forward a little.”

“I’m fine, Benton,” replied Stephanie with a shrug, adjusting her position again. “OK, so now what do I do?”

“He’s going to be very responsive,” Fraser explained, “so he just needs little movements from you. He’ll know what you want him to do.”

“OK,” Stephanie nodded confidently and set off at a slow walk towards the paddock. It only took a few minutes for her to realise that Fraser had been right about how rewarding it was to ride bareback. The reactions she got from King were amazing and she had never felt so close to a horse before; it was as if they were as one. The smile on her face said it all as they picked up speed to a trot.

“You’re doing well,” Fraser smiled. “I’m going to let go and you can take him, but don’t go too fast too quickly.” He detached the rein he was holding and watched Stephanie take King for a canter around the paddock. He couldn’t help feeling envious; he’d had so few opportunities to ride horses at all since he’d left his home in the Yukon, let alone ride bareback and he missed it. 

Dief walked up to him and sat at his heels. He was hungry, but he could tell that Fraser wasn’t interested in food at the moment; the Mountie was staring at Stephanie with his eyes wide and his lips slightly parted. It was a look that Dief had rarely, if ever, seen on his face and the meaning was obvious, even to a wolf.

Eventually Stephanie brought King to a standstill. Fraser jogged over to her to help her dismount. “Wow! That was one of the most wonderful things I’ve ever done!” she exclaimed as she swung her leg over King’s back.

Fraser gripped her waist and she held onto him tightly around his neck as he lifted her to the ground. “I knew you’d like it,” he said.

“I loved it, it was so exhilarating,” she replied, refusing to release her grasp. “I’m never going to ride any other way.”

Fraser chuckled at her enthusiasm. “Well sometimes a saddle is essential, for example on areas of rough terrain you wouldn’t be safe riding bareback.” He pointed out, hugging her closely. He was delighted that he had been able to bring so much joy to her after the pain of the last twenty four hours. “We should take King back to the stable,” he said eventually, realising that they couldn’t stay in the yard with their arms around each other forever, as much as he wanted to.

“Yes,” agreed Stephanie, finally breaking her hold. “Poor boy probably needs a drink. I may have pushed him too hard in this heat.”

Fraser stroked King on the muzzle and the animal responded with a contented whinny. “I don’t think he minded at all,” he smiled.

They took King back inside and Stephanie groomed him while Fraser found him some water and fresh hay. Fraser bolted the gate as they left and Dief barked and ran off towards the house.

“Oh dear,” sighed Fraser. “Now he’s jealous of a horse.” He rolled his eyes disapprovingly and Stephanie laughed. “I’d better feed him now too,” Fraser continued. “But if he thinks he’s getting a doughnut he has another thing coming.”

Stephanie wrapped her arms around Fraser’s waist as they walked and he draped his arm over her shoulder. He was trying not to get too carried away with the moment, but right now he felt happier than he ever had in his life before…and that scared him to death.


	6. Chapter 6

“Don’t eat so fast, you’ll get indigestion.” Fraser shook his head as Diefenbaker licked the bowl clean. 

“Don’t be so hard on him,” laughed Stephanie.

“You have obviously never spent a night in the company of a wolf with digestive issues,” replied Fraser. “It’s not pleasant.”

Stephanie giggled. Fraser was sitting on one of the dining chairs in the kitchen reading a book he’d found on the shelf. “It was my grandmother’s favourite recipe book,” Stephanie had explained and Fraser had become engrossed in the pages.

Stephanie stood motionless watching him, captivated by his physical and spiritual presence. She thought back to that morning and her emotional and ultimately futile demands for sex and she felt ashamed. He hadn’t deserved that at all, she could see that now and a lesser man would have run straight out of the door, but not Benton Fraser. He understood her more than anyone ever had before. Now, as she watched his tongue dart out to moisten his lips as he absorbed the words on the page, everything felt different and she wanted him more than ever; not for selfish reasons any more, but because she wanted to show him how she felt. She wanted him to know how it could be between them; she wanted to reward him for everything he had done for her, to reward him just for being who he was. That’s what he deserved. 

Dief had found a shady spot by the door and was stretched out, yawning, satisfied after his meal. He wasn’t going to need any attention from anyone for a while.

Stephanie glanced at the clock; there was plenty of time before Heidi was due back with Mia. Her breath hitched in anticipation and she walked over to Fraser. “Finish that later,” she instructed and she closed the book and slid it across the table, to a look of surprise from Fraser. He soon realised why she’d done it though. She sat herself on his lap, straddling him so their faces were inches apart. 

“Stephanie,” he whispered, but she wasn’t going to let him speak any more and she silenced him with a kiss. She ran her hands through his soft wavy hair as her mouth did the work and he moaned briefly as she pushed herself against him.

This time there were no doubts and Fraser kissed her deeply. Stephanie’s hair fell forward, brushing both of their faces as they kissed, but neither of them cared. Neither of them cared about anything else at that moment.

She slipped her hand between their bodies, trying desperately to pull Fraser’s shirt off his body, but the buttons refused to yield to her and she had to break her lips away from his for a moment to work on undoing them. She was panting with desire and impatience as she fumbled with his shirt, but then Fraser took her wrists and gently pulled them away. Stephanie almost died inside; surely he wasn’t going to push her away again?

Fraser’s face was red and glistening with sweat already. He looked into her eyes and suddenly realised what must be going through her mind. “Oh, no,” he said with a smile, leaning in for another brief kiss. “I don’t want you to stop,” he said, his voice low and breathy. He rested his forehead against hers for a brief moment, gathering his thoughts, before pushing himself off the chair, keeping one arm tightly around her.

Stephanie wrapped her legs around his waist and clung to his neck as he carried her up the stairs. “I…I don’t have any scented candles,” she whispered in his ear, giggling as a sudden, brief moment of nervousness washed over her

Fraser stopped at the bedroom door, leaning against the wall for support and looked deep into her eyes, taking away all of her fears. “I don’t care,” he replied with a lopsided smile and he carried into the room and lowered her gently onto the bed.

Downstairs, Diefenbaker half opened one eye and realised he was alone at last. He would never understand why humans made relationships so complicated; but he was glad that things finally appeared to be moving along for his favourite human. He yawned again and settled down for what he hoped would be a nice, long snooze.

xXxXx

“We’d better get dressed.” Stephanie sighed as she spoke. She didn’t really want to move at all. Her head was resting on Fraser’s smooth, bare chest and he had a comforting arm around her. “You shouldn’t have let me fall asleep,” she scolded him.

“You needed it,” he replied. A thin cotton sheet covered them only up to their waists and Fraser was grateful that the temperature had finally started to drop. He’d been lying there for about half an hour listening to the gentle sound of Stephanie breathing and he could have stayed there forever, but he knew they had to get up. He kissed her on the top of her head. “Heidi will be bringing Mia home soon and it would probably be inappropriate for us to greet her like this,” he said.

Stephanie giggled and lifted her head. “Naked, you mean,” she said, biting her lower lip coyly. “And in the middle of the day too, what would she think?”

Fraser lifted his head slightly to kiss her. 

“I’ll tell you what she’d think,” continued Stephanie. “She’d be insanely jealous that I’ve just spent the most amazing time in bed, making wild, passionate love with the most wonderful man in the world.”

Fraser’s face flushed red. “Wild…passionate…” he repeated and he cleared his throat. He sat up, angry with himself for his embarrassment. “We should definitely do that again soon,” he said, brushing a stray hair from her face. 

They quickly showered and made themselves presentable again. Fraser privately admonished himself for scattering his clothes all over the floor, but in the heat of the moment, neatness had been the last thing on his mind.

They sat downstairs drinking bark tea and talking about what other work needed doing urgently. “I should make a list of priorities,” Stephanie suggested. “I want to get rid of all those trees along the paddock, but I guess the plumbing is more important. The downstairs toilet keeps backing up and the last thing I need is a flood.”

“Agreed,” nodded Fraser. “So tomorrow we’ll look at the plumbing and then perhaps…”

“You don’t have to help me with all of this,” Stephanie interrupted him.

“But I want to,” replied Fraser. “I’m going to take some sick days.”

Stephanie was about to argue with him, but then she noticed the time. “Heidi is late,” she said with a frown.

“She’s probably just been delayed,” said Fraser. “Don’t worry.”

It was starting to get dark outside and Stephanie crossed to the window, looking out hopefully to see if a car was pulling up onto the drive, but there was no one there.

For the next hour, Stephanie paced the floor getting more and more anxious as the minutes passed. She tried calling Heidi several times, but there was no answer. She tried to keep calm. “The traffic can be bad this time of day,” she said, trying to convince herself more than anything. 

“Do you have an address for Heidi?” asked Fraser. “If you’ll allow me the use of your car, I’ll head over there and see if there’s a problem.”

“OK,” agreed Stephanie and she found some paperwork with the address. “I’ll stay here. I’m sure she’ll be back before you.” As she watched Fraser and Diefenbaker walk out the door, Stephanie allowed herself a moment to break down, before pulling herself together again and sitting by the phone to wait.

Fraser found the apartment empty and in darkness. He and Dief satisfied themselves that there was no one inside, so they made their way back to the house, hoping that they’d find Mia had been returned safe and sound. Unfortunately, Stephanie was still alone.

“I’ll call Ray,” said Fraser. “The Chicago PD can arrange to search for them. They’ll find her.”

“The Police won’t be interested,” replied Stephanie, trying to hold back tears. “She’s only been missing for a couple of hours; they won’t care.”

“Ray will care,” said Fraser, earnestly.

Ray arrived quickly and started making some notes. “I got Frannie organising roadblocks,” he explained, “and we’re gonna post teams at the ports and airports.”

“Oh my god, do you think she’s trying to take Mia out of the country?” asked Stephanie, squeezing Fraser’s hand.

“We don’t know yet, but we gotta cover everythin’,” explained Ray and Stephanie nodded understandingly. “Do ya have a photo of Mia?” he asked.

“I’ll go and get you one,” answered Stephanie and she ran upstairs.

Ray put down his pen and looked at Fraser. “So, what d’ya think, buddy?” he asked in a low voice.

Fraser sighed. “Something was definitely wrong with Heidi earlier,” he replied. “I don’t like this at all.”

“Me neither,” agreed Ray.

Stephanie returned with a photo of Mia. It was a few weeks old now, but you could see her distinctive blond curly hair. “I took that at the reserve,” explained Stephanie, smiling at the memories. “Mia used to love watching the elephants; it made her giggle when they sprayed themselves with water.” Suddenly, Stephanie burst into tears and fell into Fraser’s arms. “I can’t take any more of this,” she sobbed. “Why is everything happening to me?”

Fraser hugged her tightly and tried to calm her. “I wish I had answers for you,” he replied, “but I can assure you that we will do everything in our power to find Mia and bring her home safely. Now, why don’t you come and sit on the couch and I’ll get you another coffee.”

Ray got up to leave and Fraser followed him out into the hall. “Ordinarily, I’d accompany you…” he began, but Ray put a comforting hand on his shoulder and stopped him.

“No, ya gotta stay here with her,” he replied. 

“Take Diefenbaker,” urged Fraser. “He has Mia’s scent, he may be of assistance.”

Ray nodded and looked at the wolf who was eager to get to work. “OK,” he agreed. “I’ll call ya if I get any news.”

“Thank you kindly, Ray,” replied Fraser and he closed the door behind them.

As the evening turned into night, Fraser and Stephanie could do little else but sit and wait for news. Fraser switched on the TV as a distraction and it wasn’t long before Stephanie had fallen asleep. She’d drunk cup after cup of coffee in a desperate attempt to stay awake, but in the end succumbed to exhaustion, resting with her head on Fraser’s lap. He stroked her hair lovingly and wondered why all of these things were happening to such a wonderful woman at once. Life wasn’t fair and she’d been so happy this afternoon. 

Fraser glanced up to see the ghost of his father standing in front of him. “Oh, hello Dad,” he said, keeping his voice down. “How long have you been there?”

“Not long,” replied Bob. “This is a tough situation, isn’t it.”

“Indeed,” agreed Fraser. “I keep thinking that I shouldn’t have let Heidi take Mia today. I knew something was wrong, Ray and I both did. I was being selfish; I wanted to spend the time alone with Stephanie.”

“Don’t blame yourself,” replied Bob. “Stephanie wanted Mia looked after just as much as you did. No one could have predicted that this might happen and remember, you don’t know exactly what has happened yet.”

“Dad, we spent the afternoon making…making love,” Fraser’s voice hitched as he spoke. He couldn’t quite believe he was discussing this with his father. “Stephanie and I left Mia with a virtual stranger so that we could indulge in…in pleasure.” The guilt was starting to become unbearable.

“Son, there’s nothing wrong with…er…” began Bob. “Benton, when two people love each other very much…er, that is, adults have certain desires…” he trailed off awkwardly and cleared his throat.

A brief smile twitched at Fraser’s lips. “Dad,” he said. “You don’t have to explain to me why people have sexual relationships.”

“Ah, oh…ah, good,” nodded Bob. “Well what I’m trying to say is…”

“Dad, it’s OK; you don’t have to say anything,” smiled Fraser. “It’s just comforting to know that you’re there.”

Bob nodded and disappeared into the shadows.

Just after midnight, the telephone rang. Fraser got up as quickly and carefully as he could to avoid disturbing Stephanie. 

It was Ray. “Listen up, buddy; I got news,” he said.

“Good news, or bad news?” asked Fraser, steeling himself.

“Er, well, Huey and Dewey were workin’ the streets, they followed up on a few leads and they picked up Heidi a couple minutes ago,” explained Ray.

“Was Mia with her?” asked Fraser, hopefully.

“No. Sorry, buddy,” replied Ray. “She was workin’ in a bar, waitressing. She claims she doesn’t know where the baby is. I, er, I dunno what’s goin’ on yet, but I promise ya I’m gonna find out.”

“Thank you, Ray,” sighed Fraser. It wasn’t the news he’d been hoping for, but Heidi must know something so it was at least encouraging.

Stephanie stirred as Fraser replaced the handset. “Was that the phone?” she asked in a croaky voice.

“Yes. It was Ray,” replied Fraser and he explained the details to Stephanie.

“I want to talk to her,” said Stephanie, decisively and she stood up and started pulling on her boots. “She knows where my daughter is and I’m going to make her tell me.”

“Slow down,” urged Fraser. “Ray is a trained interrogator, he will find out everything.”

“I’m not sitting here waiting around anymore, Ben!” exclaimed Stephanie. “My baby girl is missing, I have to do something.”

Fraser realised that there was no point arguing with her, so he agreed to drive her to the station where Ray was surprised to see them as was Diefenbaker who came bounding up to Fraser, yapping a heartfelt apology for not having found Mia yet.

The station was bustling with people considering it was now the early hours of the morning; even Francesca Vecchio had agreed to come in to help coordinate the search teams.

“Where is she?” demanded Stephanie. “Where is the woman that took my baby?”

“I left her with a few things to think about,” explained Ray. Heidi had been completely uncooperative; claiming that she didn’t understand what was being said to her in English. Ray had pointed out in no uncertain terms that he’d heard her communicating in English with Stephanie just a few hours earlier, but Heidi was still refusing to talk so he’d spelled out the charges she was facing and the potential consequences and left her to come to her senses.

Fraser left Stephanie with Francesca and he and Ray went to observe Heidi through the two way mirror. You didn’t need to be a Detective, or a Mountie, to be able to read her body language; she was very nervous, even scared.

“Perhaps I could conduct an interview?” suggested Fraser. Ray thought about it for a moment before agreeing. He’d clear it with Welsh later somehow; his boss frequently turned a blind eye to Fraser’s non-jurisdictional involvement in the work of the Two Seven.

Fraser entered the room and sat down opposite Heidi. Ray stood behind him with his arms folded.

“Hello. You remember me, don’t you?” Fraser said to her, keeping his voice even.

Heidi did not reply.

“I know you understand me,” continued Fraser. “We conducted a conversation in English just a few hours ago. I do speak other languages; perhaps you’d prefer Russian, or maybe another of the Slavonic languages? I’m a little rusty, but I’m sure I could get by.” 

Heidi shrugged and said nothing.

“You realise that you are already in a lot of trouble, but if you continue to behave this way the consequences will be very serious for you,” Fraser said, his voice becoming more menacing as he spoke. The veins in his neck were pulsing as he fought to keep his temper in check. “Now, where is Mia Cabot? Why were you working in a bar when you were charged with taking care of her?”

“I need to work for money,” replied Heidi. “I don’t know where the baby is.”

“You were already working for Stephanie Cabot,” said Fraser. He was becoming more and more agitated. Ray rarely saw him this worked up.

“But she not pay me,” replied Heidi. “I have to work another job.”

“One of your neighbours told us ya also work in a laundromat,” said Ray. 

Heidi nodded slowly. “I have three jobs,” she admitted. “I need the money to stay in this country.”

“So who takes care of Stephanie Cabot’s baby while you’re doin’ the other jobs?” asked Ray incredulously.

Heidi decided that now was a good time to remain silent again. Fraser, however, did not agree with her. He’d had enough. It wasn’t often that his temper boiled over, but a woman he cared deeply about was being put through a terrible ordeal and he couldn’t allow that to happen. Fraser stood up and slammed his hands on the table, leaning across until his face was inches from hers. “Where is the baby?” he demanded. 

Heidi flinched as he came towards her, turning her head away and bringing her hands up to her face defensively. Ray had seen that kind of reaction many times before and things slowly started to click into place.

“Miss, kidnapping is a federal offence,” continued Fraser, “and if you do not answer my questions, you will be looking at some very serious charges.” He pointed his finger at her for emphasis and she flinched again. “Now tell me, what have you done with Mia?” He shouted this time, unable to keep control any longer.

Ray grabbed his partner by the shoulder and pulled him away. “Cool it, buddy,” he said. It wasn’t often that he had to do that to Fraser; usually the roles were reversed, but Fraser was too emotionally attached to this case and he wasn’t thinking straight. He wasn’t seeing things that he would normally have noticed. 

Fraser stood back and breathed deeply, trying to regain his self-control. He realised he was being unusually heavy handed, but he felt the situation warranted it.

Ray glanced at his buddy before taking the chair Fraser had been occupying minutes earlier. He looked directly at Heidi. “Who’s beatin’ on ya?” he asked, gently.

Fraser was shocked. Why would Ray ask that? Then he suddenly realised he’d missed the signs. He hadn’t even considered the instinctive defensive reactions Heidi had displayed when he’d been intimidating her just now. Of course this was a woman used to violence. He suddenly felt guilty. He’d allowed his personal feelings in this case to cloud his abilities as a Police Officer.

“My…my boyfriend, Pavel Dushku,” stammered Heidi and tears started to fall down her face as she finally told them everything she knew.

Heidi’s boyfriend was demanding money to help her stay in America and she’d had to take on three jobs to pay him. She’d known that she had an extra shift in the laundromat this afternoon and had decided not to return to work for Stephanie as there was no guarantee she would get paid, but her boyfriend had agreed to watch the baby for her and made her go to Stephanie’s to collect Mia after all. He was meant to bring Mia to the laundromat so that Heidi could return her to Stephanie, but he hadn’t arrived and Heidi had to get to her waitressing job because she couldn’t afford to get fired. She knew she should have alerted someone, but she was scared of what her violent boyfriend might do to her.

“I’m so sorry,” sniffed Heidi. “I should have left Pavel long time ago, but he help me to stay here. I cannot go back to my homeland, it’s not safe for me there.”

Fraser decided that particular issue should be dealt with another time. Right now their priority was finding Mia. Heidi gave them as much information as she could about her so-called boyfriend and they left her to make a full statement to one of the uniforms.

“What? No!” exclaimed Stephanie when they told her what had happened. 

“It’s going to be alright,” Fraser tried to reassure her. “We have his name and address and his description is out there; people are searching the city.”

“I’m gonna head over to his place,” said Ray.

“I’ll, um…” Fraser began. He really wanted to go with Ray this time, but he didn’t want to leave Stephanie alone.

“Go!” she told him, forcing a smile. “Go be a cop. I need to know you’re looking for Mia. I’ll be OK here.”

Fraser nodded and surprised the whole squadroom by taking her in his arms for a brief, but passionate kiss. Francesca stifled a yelp and had to run to the ladies room to calm herself down.

Ray drove through the streets at top speed. Fraser was beyond caring about traffic regulations by now. He was more concerned that he’d missed the fact that Heidi was a victim of domestic violence. “Perhaps I should have remained at the station?” he said to Ray as his partner jumped another red light. “It appears my skills have been impaired by…by…”

“By love?” offered Ray and looked across at his buddy with questioning eyebrows.

Fraser swallowed hard. “Quite possibly, Ray,” he admitted. “Quite possibly.”

“We’re all desperate to find Stephanie’s baby, it’s easy to overlook somethin’ when you’re focussin’ on the prize,” said Ray reassuringly.

They arrived at Pavel Dushku’s apartment and knocked on the door. There was no answer. “Police! Open up!” yelled Ray, but there was still silence.

Ray was about to kick the door in, but Fraser beat him to it. Ray was momentarily stunned; usually he would have expected a lecture about not having a warrant. Jeez, this woman has really got under his skin, thought Ray with half a smile.

They started to search the apartment, but before they’d got very far Dief started to bark and they ran into the back bedroom. He’d found a pink blanket that Fraser immediately recognised as Mia’s. “Good boy,” he said, crouching down to praise his wolf. He glanced up at Ray. “So she was here earlier,” he said, his heart pounding with the fear that Mia was in danger, “but where is she now?”

Ray shook his head. “Keep lookin’, buddy,” he said. “There might be somethin’ else.”

Fraser and Dief continued to search the bedroom while Ray went into the kitchen. Almost immediately Ray called out to his buddy and Fraser went to join him. “What is it?” asked Fraser, desperately hoping it would be a clue that could lead them straight to Mia.

“It’s a note addressed to Heidi, but I dunno what it says; it’s in Russian or somethin’,” sighed Ray and he handed Fraser a piece of folded yellow paper. “I guess it’s from Dushku.”

Fraser scanned down the note. “I believe the language is Bulgarian, actually,” he said. He couldn’t read every word, but he understood enough to be able to glean the meaning. He looked up at Ray, his face grave. “This is a ransom note.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Do ya wanna go over the plan again?” Ray asked. He was on his feet; even though it was almost four o’clock in the morning, he was a bundle of nervous energy.

"No," replied Stephanie firmly. "The instructions in the note were very clear: he wants Heidi and me to meet him at the dockside at ten o’clock in the morning with the money and then he'll give me back my baby."

Fraser looked at her with admiration; he was in awe of her strength and dignity at this time. "Heidi did very well when she spoke to him on the telephone," he said, "she sounded confident and relaxed; Dushku has no reason to suspect that anything is amiss."

Stephanie nodded. "But what if he looks in the bag and realises it's not real money?" she asked.

"We'll have him in cuffs before he gets the chance," Ray reassured her.

"The note said no Police," Stephanie reminded them. "If he sees you hiding there he might...he might hurt Mia..." she trailed off and took a deep breath, trying to retain her composure, before adding, "He might have already hurt her."

Fraser took her hands in his and looked into her eyes. "We will remain out of sight until you and Mia are safe," he promised her. "Dushku is an opportunist. He has no reason to hurt Mia; his only wish is to extort money from you. If he cannot return her to you safely then he will not get what he wants."

"We know he's violent, though," continued Stephanie. "I actually feel sorry for Heidi, even after all of this."

"Well ya know we already have a Plan B," Ray pointed out. "Say the word and we'll mobilise a team."

"A SWAT team, you mean," scoffed Stephanie. "I don't want anyone firing a gun anywhere near my daughter. Besides, we don't know where he is; he could have taken Mia anywhere."

"Heidi gave us some suggestions," Ray reminded her. "We've got people out there now checkin' 'em out. If we find Dushku, ya only have to say the word and we'll go in."

"No, we'll stick with the plan," replied Stephanie determinedly. "I'm not risking my daughter's life. Like you said, Benton, this guy is an opportunist; he just wants my money, although I have no idea where he thought I'd get that kind of money from? Even if I had access to Daddy's accounts..." she trailed off as a yawn overwhelmed her.

"You should try to get some sleep," Fraser urged. "We still have a few hours before we have to leave."

Stephanie shook her head. She couldn't possibly sleep while a violent stranger still had her daughter...or so she thought.

Less than half an hour later, Stephanie was stretched out on the couch in Lieutenant Welsh's office, with Diefenbaker standing at her feet protectively. 

xXxXx

“You don’t have to do this,” said Fraser, handing a holdall filled mostly with cut up newspaper to Stephanie.

The sun had already started to heat the day, but Stephanie felt cold inside. “Yes, I do,” she replied, firmly. “What’s the time?”

Fraser glanced at his trusty watch. “It’s ten minutes to ten,” he replied and Stephanie nodded, allowing herself a glimmer of hope that this would all be over soon.

“Remember what I said,” Ray spoke to Heidi. “No funny business. Just, er, just do what he expects; we’ve got your back.”

“And then he never hurt me again?” Heidi looked from Ray to Fraser, begging for confirmation.

“Never again,” Fraser reassured her. “We will protect you.”

Heidi nodded. She couldn’t quite bring herself to look Stephanie in the eye. Pavel Dushku was a violent bully, but she still couldn’t help but blame herself for what had happened; she wished she’d been strong enough to stand up to him.

“He’s not gonna be doin’ anythin’ to anyone from his jail cell,” noted Ray. “Now c’mon buddy, we’d better get outta sight.”

Fraser and Ray got into position behind some discarded packing crates. They could see Huey and Dewey on the opposite side of the path hiding behind a large yellow shipping container and Fraser made a thumbs-up sign to the other detectives, which Tom Dewey returned with a nod. 

Stephanie and Heidi walked up the path and sat on a bench as they had been instructed, looking out across the lake. A huge lake freighter had recently docked and cranes were starting to unload its cargo, while in the distance another ship was heading out into open water, probably bound for Saulte San Marie.

The two women waited in silence. Heidi struggled with feelings of guilt and shame and she tangled and untangled her fingers. She knew it was her fault that Mia had been taken, but she had been too afraid of what Dushku might do to her that she never questioned him. 

Every second that went past was a second too long for Stephanie. She was trying to keep terrible thoughts at bay. _What if he really has hurt Mia? What if this was a trick and he was never going to give her back at all?_

Finally, a car pulled up and a man got out. Without saying a word, Heidi got to her feet and Stephanie realised the man must be Dushku. She quickly followed Heidi, but feelings of panic washed over her as she realised he appeared to be alone. _Where is my baby?_

Fraser and Ray observed from a safe distance. “Where’s the baby?” hissed Ray.

“She’s in the vehicle,” replied Fraser. “I can hear her; she doesn’t appear to be distressed, but perhaps a little hungry.”

Stephanie had obviously heard her daughter’s cries too as she started walking towards the car, but Dushku grabbed her by the hand to stop her, shaking his head. He clearly wanted to stay in control of the situation. He took the bag from Stephanie and dropped it on the floor; then he crouched down, undid the zip and started looking at the contents. 

The bag had been packed very carefully so the first thing he came to was bundles of genuine US Dollar bills and Dushku’s greedy eyes lit up as he picked up one of them and leafed through it. Satisfied, he nodded towards the car and Stephanie was finally allowed to run to her daughter. Heidi tried to leave too, but Dushku wasn’t about to let that happen and he grabbed her arm, tugging her hard so that she almost lost her balance.

Fraser desperately wanted to intervene now, but he knew that although Dushku did not appear to be armed, he may have a concealed weapon so they didn’t want to do anything that might cause him to get spooked. They had to stick to the plan: wait until Stephanie and Mia were safe and then move in. Fraser could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he counted down the seconds until he could be sure that Stephanie was going to be OK.

Ray was in charge of the operation and he knew exactly when the time was right. With a hand signal to Huey and Dewey they ran forward; surprising Dushku who reacted by pushing Heidi to the ground and trying to run away, but he wasn’t going to get far with the three Chicago Police Detectives and a wolf hot on his tail.

Fraser ran to Stephanie who finally had Mia safely in her arms and hugged them both tightly. “I’m OK, she’s OK,” sobbed Stephanie through tears of joy and relief.

Fraser looked over his shoulder at Heidi who was still on the ground.

“Go and help her,” pleaded Stephanie. “We’re fine.”

Fraser ran to Heidi who was a little groggy after hitting her head when she fell, but largely unharmed. He glanced up ahead to see Dushku face down on the ground with Ray’s knee firmly in the small of his back as he slapped handcuffs around his wrists while Huey and Dewey re-holstered their weapons. 

Fraser breathed a huge sigh of relief and glanced over at Stephanie. She smiled at him, but Fraser saw something different in her. Something had changed; he wasn’t sure what it was, but at that moment he felt something splinter inside.

xXxXx

It was evening before they’d been able to leave the Two Seven, but at last they were alone and back at the house. 

“She’s asleep,” whispered Stephanie, closing the door behind her as quietly as she could. Fraser was waiting for her on the sofa and she settled herself beside him, wrapping her arms tightly around his middle and nestling her head against his shoulder

Fraser felt her finally relax against his body and she stroked her hair tenderly. “You should do the same,” he suggested. “It’s been a long day.”

“I…I never want to go through anything like that again,” said Stephanie. She let out a long, slow breath. “It’s all my fault; I was being selfish. Mia is my daughter; I should be the one to take care of her, not a stranger. In the village where we lived back in Kenya, the women took their children everywhere with them no matter what they were doing. These women work hard, Benton. There is so much to be done in the village, but they just strap their babies to their backs and carry on.”

“The traditional Inuit tribes have a similar attitude,” explained Fraser. “It seems at odds with the general philosophy of our modern world, but it’s worked for them for hundreds of years.”

Stephanie laughed. “The girls I went to school with wouldn’t dream of raising their children without professional help,” she said. “Until you’ve lived with people who have different ideas, then you have no concept of how rewarding a different lifestyle can be.”

“Who are we to judge, or impose our ideas onto other groups of people?” Fraser pondered. 

“Everyone helped each other. It was such a wonderful place,” sighed Stephanie, smiling at the happy memories. “The other mothers were so good to me when Mia was born. I was so scared, but they brought me into their community and we all looked out for each other.”

They sat in silence for a while, lost in their memories. Fraser closed his eyes and thought back to the many times he’d lived amongst the Inuit. His own upbringing had been a largely lonely affair, made bearable only by the local communities they lived in as his grandparents moved around the Territories and he’d learnt to embrace many of the traditional ways of life. His heart ached for home.

Stephanie yawned and sat up, gazing at his peaceful face. She wondered how she’d ever have got through the last few days without him by her side.

Fraser opened his eyes, leaving his memories behind once again. 

Stephanie smiled and kissed him warmly. “You are going to stay tonight, aren’t you?” she asked, hopefully.

“If you’ll have me,” replied Fraser. He had been waiting for her to ask, not wanting to impose himself on her. He would have understood completely if she’d wanted to be alone tonight.

Being alone, however, was the last thing on Stephanie’s mind. She stood up and grabbed his hand, pulling him to his feet too. Then she kissed him again, more passionately this time and they both lost themselves in each other for a few blissful moments. 

Fraser’s body ached to be closer to her again, but he let her take the lead. She had to heal in her own way and he refused to allow his desires to take over and hinder her progress.

Stephanie finally broke away. “Take me to bed, Ben,” she breathed, looking deep into his blue eyes. “Please.”

xXxXx

“He’s not gonna show, is he.” Ray sighed and stared out into the black of the night. He and Fraser had been on a stakeout for the last four hours; sitting in the GTO waiting for a suspect to appear, but so far the only other signs of life they’d seen at the remote location were a young couple in a rusty old Plymouth station wagon which they parked under a tree. They had presumably thought they were alone as they proceeded to engage in a lascivious act. Ray had no intention of interrupting them to point out the illegality of their actions, although Fraser made a note of the licence plate anyway.

“Jeez, buddy, give the kids a break,” said Ray, rolling his eyes. “I thought Steph woulda brought out your romantic side by now. It’s been nearly a month.”

“Romance is not the issue here, Ray,” replied Fraser. “Young people need to learn that as they embark on romance, they must also develop a sense of responsibility.”

Ray laughed. “I bet you’re a barrel of laughs in bed!” he grinned.

Fraser blushed hard. “Ray, we’ve been over this already,” he sighed, rubbing at his eyebrow with his thumb. “I am not prepared to discuss the intimate details of my relationship with Stephanie. It would not be chivalrous.” He had been sleeping at Stephanie’s almost every night since Mia was kidnapped and their feelings for each other were growing stronger all the time. He’d never imagined he could feel so comfortable sharing his life with anyone.

Ray laughed harder now. He couldn’t help teasing his buddy, it was just too easy; he really didn’t want to know what Fraser and Stephanie got up to between the sheets. 

Ray was just pleased to see Fraser happy….at least he appeared to be most of the time, but Ray had noticed the odd occasion when his buddy seemed to be worried about something. Ray had called him on it a couple of times, but Fraser had insisted everything was fine and Ray agreed to drop the matter.

 _Maybe he’s overwhelmed by a sense of responsibility?_ Ray thought, flippantly, but before he could quiz Fraser any further another car pulled up and a man and woman got out. “That’s him,” hissed Ray, opening the door of the GTO. “And he’s with Suzanne Miles; two for one. Pitter patter, let’s get at ‘er.”

xXxXx

Stephanie sat on the floor with Mia on her lap. Mia was playing with a toy elephant Fraser had carved for her. It had articulated joints and she giggled every time her tiny hands grasped the smooth wood and moved the animal’s trunk. 

“The drain is now unblocked,” announced Fraser, walking into the room carrying a large spanner. “We should test the plumbing again. I’m hoping there will be a vast improvement.”

Stephanie got to her feet, placing Mia carefully in her rocker chair. She gasped when she caught sight of Fraser. He was shirtless and beads of sweat were glistening on his bare chest. The excessive summer temperatures were showing no sign of abating and it had obviously been hard work fixing the drainage system. “Thank you,” she smiled, tugging her lower lip into her teeth. “I think perhaps you should test the plumbing by taking a shower!” She walked over to him and placed a kiss on his lips. “Maybe I’ll join you?” she added, seductively.

Fraser worked up even more of a sweat in the shower with Stephanie than he had unblocking the drains. They made love at every opportunity now and Fraser was in awe of the way it made him feel; physically of course, but emotionally too. The joy of sharing intimacy with Stephanie took his breath away every time.

Later that day they took Bessie and King for ride. Some of Stephanie’s father’s money had finally started to come through and as much as she loved riding bareback, she was keen to test out the new saddles and tack she’d bought. Ma Vecchio was looking after Mia; although Stephanie had initially been determined not to let her daughter out of her sight again, she had finally agreed that Francesca’s mother could be trusted and had started to leave Mia with her for a few hours when she really needed time to herself. 

As they rode through the trees, Stephanie’s mind wandered back to something that had been occupying her thoughts over the last few days. The feelings were getting stronger, no matter how much she tried to convince herself that they weren’t and she couldn’t ignore it any more, no matter how hard she tried. She watched Fraser as he rode King a short distance ahead of her; he was so at home on horseback, just as she was. She loved these times they shared, just the two of them and the two horses enjoying the beauty of nature. She couldn’t shake the thought that she needed to have a long talk with him though; they’d so quickly become comfortable, perhaps too comfortable. 

“Benton!” she called out. “Shall we stop here for a while?”

Fraser pulled King to a halt. “Yes, this is a delightful location,” he said as he dismounted. Then suddenly he froze and tilted his head to the side slightly.

“What is it?” asked Stephanie.

“I can hear…it’s a bird; a swallow-tailed kite, I believe,” replied Fraser. “It appears to be in distress.” He crouched down and spoke to Dief, who immediately ran off. Fraser quickly tied King to a tree and set off after his wolf, with Stephanie following them.

They soon found the source of the noise; the bird was tangled in some dry twine and couldn’t get free. It was screeching and flapping its wings as it struggled.

“Oh no,” said Stephanie sadly and she knelt beside the distressed bird. 

Fraser knelt beside her and together they tried to calm the bird. Fraser covered its head with his handkerchief and Stephanie gently brushed its feathers with her finger and it began to struggle less and less.

“She doesn’t appear to be badly injured,” observed Fraser as he carefully started to untangle talons and wings. 

Stephanie watched him work. A lot of people would have just left the bird, she realised. So few people cared as deeply about wildlife as she did, but her heart melted at the sight of him talking softly to the bird as he tenderly released it from its bonds.

Soon the kite was free and Fraser gently carried it out from under the shade of the trees and into the bright sunlight so he could examine it properly. The bird appeared relaxed and tolerated Fraser fussing over it. 

“Is she OK?” asked Stephanie. “Do you think she will be able to fly?”

“Apart from a few minor bruises and abrasions, this bird has been very lucky,” smiled Fraser. “Shall we see if she wants to fly away?”

Stephanie nodded and they set the bird free, backing away to give it some space. At first it just walked around the dry ground, but then suddenly it opened its wings and took to the skies. 

“She’s beautiful,” smiled Stephanie. “You were amazing with her.”

Fraser shrugged, embarrassed at the praise and he and Stephanie stood hand in hand watching the kite swoop and soar before it flew out of sight.

They stood there for a while longer, taking in their surroundings, but then Stephanie turned to Fraser. She took a deep breath. “Ben,” she began. “There’s…there’s something I need to tell you.”

Fraser took her other hand in his and nodded solemnly. “I know,” he replied quietly.

“You do?” Stephanie was surprised.

Fraser nodded. “When are you leaving?”

Stephanie gasped. He knew her better than she knew herself. “I don’t know yet. I just know I can’t stay here; I don’t belong here anymore and I don’t want to raise my daughter here. I want to take her back to Africa.”

Fraser had known this moment would come. The realisation that Stephanie would be leaving him had become apparent a few days ago. He was used to it by now. Everyone he cared about left him eventually, but part of him had hoped she might wait a little longer, or perhaps change her mind. Deep down, though, he knew she would go.

“Come with me,” she said, her eyes begging.

Those words sent a chill through Fraser. Those words…Victoria… He couldn’t speak; he could barely breathe.

“Ben, please,” urged Stephanie. “Come with me. Think of all the good we could do over there, all the animals we could save. This doesn’t have to be the end.”

Fraser forced all thoughts of Victoria away; Stephanie was not her, this was not the same. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do that,” he replied quietly. “I don’t belong here in Chicago any more than you do, but I need to go home to the Territories and I think I need to do it soon.”

Tears started to fall down Stephanie’s cheeks. She’d known all along that he wouldn’t be coming. He was right, he belonged in the snowy frozen landscape of his homeland. “You’d probably melt in Africa,” she said, forcing a tiny laugh.

Fraser smiled. “You may be right,” he acknowledged. “You should follow your heart,” he continued. “And your heart lies in Africa.” 

“It doesn’t feel like home here anymore,” Stephanie sobbed. “There are far too many ghosts; Dad, Porthos, even Mom and she’s been gone for eleven years. I’m sorry I let things get this far between us,” she added. “I was hoping I was wrong about my feelings. I should have told you sooner.”

“I’ve known for a while,” replied Fraser. “It wouldn’t have changed anything anyway; the last few weeks have been…” he trailed off. There were no words to explain how special his time with Stephanie had been to him.

Stephanie hadn’t been sure how he would react and perhaps she had hoped he would yell at her; declare his undying love for her and demand that she stayed, but that wasn’t the Benton Fraser she knew and loved. She would miss him forever, but she had to go. 

He took her in his arms and they kissed for the final time.

xXxXx

“She’s what?” exclaimed Ray. “She’s leaving?” He had been surprised when Fraser had turned up unannounced at his apartment carrying pizza and he had known immediately that something was wrong.

“She’s going to sell the estate, put some money in a trust fund for Mia and the rest will go towards the animal projects she will be involved in,” Fraser explained. He placed the slice of pizza he’d been holding back in the box; he wasn’t hungry.

“Just like that?” Ray was stunned. “What about you? I mean, I thought things were goin’ great between you two?”

“They were,” nodded Fraser and tears started to form in his eyes. “But sometimes circumstances force people apart. I completely understand her decision.”

“Jeez, buddy, aren’t ya even gonna fight for her?” asked Ray. Fraser was taking this too well; Ray knew he was holding his feelings inside, but that was how his buddy dealt with things. He would be here for Fraser if and when he needed to let those feelings out, just like Fraser had been there for him on so many occasions.

“I don’t want to hold her back,” replied Fraser, his voice cracking with emotion. “I believe she’s doing the right thing for herself and for Mia. It would be unreasonable of me to make demands of her for purely selfish reasons.”

Ray nodded. He knew he’d made selfish demands of Stella himself and that hadn’t got him anywhere at all. “Are ya OK?” he asked gently.

"Yes, Ray, I'm fine," Fraser reassured him with a smile. "Of course I'm...sad," he continued, his smile fading a little, "but Stephanie and I will part as friends and will remain in contact. One day I hope to visit her in Africa to experience for myself the wonderful work that she’ll be doing and Stephanie will return from time to time; she has family in Oregon, an aunt and cousins. They have a vineyard and Stephanie has promised to show me the mountains in the region one day.”

Ray sat back in the chair and tried to take it all in. He really felt for his buddy and he slapped him affectionately on the back. “Ya saw this comin’, didn’t ya,” he said and Fraser nodded. “What are we gonna do, buddy?” Ray asked. 

“About what, exactly?” asked Fraser, tugging at his earlobe.

“About our love lives,” replied Ray. “People have more luck in car wrecks.”

“I would imagine that if I knew the answer to that question, I would be a very rich man,” observed Fraser dryly.

“But, ya really liked her, didn’t ya,” sighed Ray, sadly. “And I saw ya with the kid, y'were a natural. I figured this one was for keeps.”

“Ray, please, there’s no point in thinking about what might have been,” replied Fraser, echoing the advice his father had given him a few weeks ago. “I admire Stephanie more for having the strength and bravery to make this decision. It is, undoubtedly, the right decision for her.”

“We gotta find ourselves some women,” said Ray. He hadn’t eaten much pizza either and he put the box with the remaining slices on the floor for a grateful Diefenbaker. Clearly the wolf’s appetite had not been affected by the low mood of his human companions.

“Some?” queried Fraser.

Ray laughed. “Well, y’know. I meant one each,” he clarified.

“Ah,” Fraser was relieved.

“Coz I still wanna have kids,” said Ray, getting to his feet and crossing to the pile of videotapes he had stacked on the floor next to his TV. “And I figure if the Stella was gonna come runnin’ back to me, beggin’ for forgiveness and offerin’ to have my babies, she’d, er, she’d have done it by now.”

“Most likely she would have by now,” agreed Fraser. He had been surprised at how quickly he’d developed feelings for baby Mia and it had made him reconsider his ideas about becoming a parent; it hadn’t been something he’d seriously considered could be part of his life before.

“So, we gotta, y’know, expand our social circle,” continued Ray, choosing a film and putting it into his VCR.

“We have?” This conversation was starting to make Fraser nervous.

“Yeah,” replied Ray. He picked up the remote control, but immediately put it down again. “C’mon, startin’ right now,” he said. “Forget this movie, I’ve seen it ten times already. We’re gonna hit the town; check out a few clubs and I don’t mean checkin’ their liquor licences are up to date.”

“We are?” Now Fraser began to sweat. He really didn’t enjoy the types of establishments that Ray had taken him to in the past. “Now?”

“Yeah, now,” Ray laughed and grabbed his coat. “Relax, buddy. It’ll be fun.”

And Ray was right. It was fun. Fraser, in particular, had great fun taking down a drug dealer who was selling his wares in one of the bars.

“This is not quite what I had in mind,” sighed Ray as he dragged the perp into the Two Seven just as the sun was beginning to rise.

“I had an exhilarating evening,” grinned Fraser. 

Ray grinned back; it was good to see a smile back on his buddy’s face, even if it was caused by arresting a drug dealer. Ray knew what it felt like to have his heart broken and he resolved to keep a close eye on his buddy for a while, but if tonight was anything to go by, he had a feeling that Fraser was going to be OK. The old Mountie spark was still there. There was a woman out there for him to share his life with somewhere and one for Ray too, he hoped. They just had to find them.

THE END


End file.
